Haha, yes, but I never called him step-daddy.

He was one of those old-school assholes that I didn't pick up the pearls of wisdom from as a hard-headed stupid teenager.

TIL my step-father was a philosopher.

His saying was: "Boy, a hard head gonna make for a soft ass and I aim to tenderize yours."

And he proceeded to do so many times over the course of my teenage years.l

It made me smarter about not getting caught.

Then I realized that if I didn't do <insert teen problem>, I didn't have to worry about being caught.

I would rather it be the Washington Team Football or better known as WTF.