Absolutely this. It’s not like HR has no idea what the position is worth. They can throw out a range to see if you’re both aligned.

If they want you to name your current salary, it’s so they can lowball you, period. And as far as I’m concerned, OP dodged a major bullet. There’s a reason this shit is illegal—it’s exploitative as hell.

Employers are the ones hiring, they can name their range. And if they refuse to—wtf are they hiding?

I’m all for therapy. For me, it feels like untangling one big knot with lots of little tangles. Your knit might be feelings about money, and all the little tangles are things you were shamed for wanting, or lessons your parents taught you, or bad memories around money and friends, etc.

You were programmed a specific way from birth because your parents wanted to keep you safe. It came from a good place, based on their own experiences, but now your programming is old and not serving you. You just need an update to your code. You’ll still be someone who knows how to be frugal, but with less anxiety about spending money on worthwhile things.