duelingThoughts
duelingThoughts t1_izuvymm wrote
Reply to comment by EclecticAndIndubious in [WP] You wake up, and stumble to the bathroom to pee. You realize you have a tattoo on your arm you didn’t see before. It reads “You have Alzheimer’s. You love your wife. Your name is Keith.” Then you notice your hand, on which is scrawled in sharpie: “THE TATTOOS ARE A LIE”. by benjancewicz
Wow terrifying. I love your unique vocabulary, and especially the phrase using a comparison to God for physical features in the negative.
My only critique is that the first scary phrase is "are you ready for the last part?" Versus the end, "are you ready for the second part?" I feel like those should match, but maybe you have a reason. I feel like second part is scarier personally.
Well done!
duelingThoughts t1_ivpt7hj wrote
Reply to comment by articulatedWriter in [SP] "I wish for supernatural charisma." "Done! You have two wishes left." "Only two?" by SpookieSkelly
Clever! Charisma isn't always about convincing people, sometimes it's convincing the right people. I also enjoyed the implication that because the charisma wasn't their own it essentially turned them into a puppet. Minor critique, I think the Mother Nature connection to death could use some work, I think that's the weakest of four tales.
Perhaps consider re-ordering it, as I feel like Mother Nature would be before the rest. Unless, the order isn't chronological but in order of precedence? I could see that.
duelingThoughts t1_je4ycs3 wrote
Reply to Please don't leave me like this, Me, Digital/Mixed, 2023 by Highskore
I didn't notice the movement at first. This is interesting, and for some reason I am reminded of the poor father in the news stabbed to death in front of his kid while bystanders pretended not to see, or otherwise record the incident.
The title and the art evoke strong feelings for me.