carbinePRO

carbinePRO t1_jefyufn wrote

>Sec is really important to some people and for those people being rejected and shat all over for wanting it is damaging to their mental health.

What? Again with vilifying of OP's gf. She's not maliciously withholding sex. What is your problem? Not being in the mood shouldn't be damaging to your partner's mental health if there's proper communication happening. Like I said earlier, the best course of action here is to communicate feelings and desires with each other as it seems that all OP has ever done is just ask for sex. He doesn't know the why. He needs the why before a solution or compromise can be made.

>If I started dating someone and everything was normal then they were like “oh by the way I’m ace and will never have sex with you” I’d block their number right then.

You've exposed your ignorance, because ace-folk still have do and like having sex. It's just not as frequent or a motivator for them like it is for most. Please leave your bias at the door. I don't think you're able to have a level-headed discussion on this topic as long as you keep making bias claims against ace-folk.

0

carbinePRO t1_jefxq0g wrote

So then if they're going to stay together she has to put out? That's a pretty shallow and manipulative ultimatum, don't you think?

I agree that the advice here is to have a larger discussion about wants and needs, but you're coming out here with a massive bias and ignorant stance against aromantic individuals. It's not wrong how they do (or don't) feel about sex. All you needed to say was, "She needs to change pills." The rest was extremely, unnecessarily vilifying of OP's gf.

>Sex is one of my favorite things.

Please leave your bias out of this.

1

carbinePRO t1_jefpka0 wrote

>Also if the pill is the problem, we don’t have many other options as I can’t use condoms

And that excuse is?

Imma level with you, the pill hormonally affects women. It took my wife a while to get used to the changes. It totally bombed her sex drive. Either you put up with it and wait, or you break up with her. It's that simple. Albeit really shallow. There's more to relationships than just sex.

7

carbinePRO t1_jae33rj wrote

You did the right thing in telling him. He can now be a better support since he's in the loop of what's going on.

>I feel like i have to support my bf too and make sure i am “happy” even if i am not on the inside when i do see him again

That's just being in a relationship. You support each other.

Stay in therapy. You seem like you're suffering from clinical depression. Stay safe, OP.

1

carbinePRO t1_jacraqn wrote

Because he sees the person behind the flaws. We all have something about us that isn't perfect. It sounds like he wants to comfort you. This is a guy I wouldn't toss aside. He thinks your special, and that's definitely worth something. Sometimes it takes another person's perspective to see what makes us special.

I wouldn't start dating right now as I think you're not ready. I think you need to determine whether or not you're trying to force something that isn't there because of your grandpa. I suggest therapy.

1

carbinePRO t1_jacm8mr wrote

Nobody wants to hear you complain about encountering some sweaty guys who smack-talked. You writing a whole post makes you seem incredibly fragile or just someone who doesn't play online much. If you can't handle random encounters online, then use the mute function. Engaging with people like this is what they're looking for. Playing into their games will make them do it more. Doing shit like what you're doing now is going to make you target for online harassment because you engage.

0