Don’t forget EXCLUSIVELY do these things

THIS ISN'T LOVE THIS IS TOXIC CODEPENDENCY AND EMOTIONAL MANIPULATION! The reason you can't imagine your life without him is because you are losing who you are as a person to this relationship. You are breaking yourself down to fit into his life. Who he tells you you are is not who you are and you need to get out of this relationship. Not give a promise ring that mentally puts you deeper in this shit. You both would be better off separately.

We used to call my bffs mom's car the interrogation room. Every time we would get in the car she would ask us what we plan on doing with our lives (in a much nicer way, she's a very sweet woman it was just a lot at 18). We all got our drivers licenses to avoid this situation.

The solution is to avoid bringing him around your parents. Your parents sound like they've been doing this forever, so you can't expect them to change. You CAN avoid putting your partners in that situation. If your parents ask why they haven't met your SO or why they haven't seen him in a while you can take that opportunity to talk to them about the insane interview questions.

Sorry boo, you got dumped.

Also, he basically called you dumb, annoying and DREADS COMING HOME TO YOU?!? That isn't really the soulmate level shit you think it is. Especially since you guys have had 5-years to figure it out! Pressure (of 2 people and anmials being in a bachelor suite) can either make diamonds or it can make crap, and it sounds like it's made crap.

I know it's hard right now, but when you look back at this relationship in a year or two - without the rose colored glasses you have on right now - you're going to see how it just wasn't the one. I used to think that my ex was my soulmate because we kept finding our way back to eachother, so it had to be fate! But now that I've stepped back I can see it for what it was. I was constantly an anxious mess because I could never predict what would start a fight (and I use the term "fight" loosely, since it was more him getting mad/being rude about something I did or didn't do). I told my therapist once that I couldn't imagine my life without him, and the thought alone brought me to tears and she played the devils advocate and said that maybe the reason I feel that way is because I've lost my sense of self in this relationship by trying to hard to make it work and the reason I can't imagine my life without him is because I don't know who I am without him. At the time, I thought she was wrong. 3 years post breakup, she was absolutely right. Your ex didn't bother to try and make things better (and if he did it really wasn't working), his resentment kept building to a point where he strongly dislikes mundane things that you do. That is not a functional relationship, and there isn't really any saving it because that's all he sees now so while he still likes you as a friend, any hint of romance will be laced with those resentments. I hope you find healing and a love that doesn't need 5-years to flourish or fizzle. <3