Son of this, daughter of that... It's been so long I don't really care, these people just don't give up, I've known every single one of their line but I just can't bring myself to care.

Each day it's a poisoned drink, I actually like the almond flavor of cyanide, I try to go for a walk and a couple of arrows pierce my cloak, my tailor must love me, I don't know what I did to these people but they keep yelling "YOU WILL NOT BE FORGIVEN!" as if I knew what happened to them.

Maybe it was an accident, I've had countless over my eternal life, maybe I was rude, maybe they just decided to stalk me and start pestering out of a sudden.

All I know it's that these people just won't quit, and it's honestly quite admirable, I've never had anyone hate me or even remember me for this long, I think I'm starting to like this; being remembered that is.

Thanks! First time doing this so I know my writing needs work but it was fun!

We always have problems with the printer, new guy helped us fix it, he said "Oi, why is de paper empty?!" He punched a hole on the side of the machine, thing works better than ever before.

Today boss wanted something done about the new landing page we've been working on, new guy told our team: "Oi, where is de git button?! smole people want dem fing!" He suggested a button with the word "BUY" on it, a huge red button on the center of the website and our online orders have gone up by 40%.

New guy stole my sandwich from the office fridge today, I don't really want to argue about it, I'm not sure he knows that the food in there belongs to everyone in the office, he ate everything, even Steve's birthday cake... Poor Steve.

Boss has been eyeing my cubicle recently I think I might get the promotion my coworkers have been talking about, with the new guy in my team we've been having zero problems with the new servers, new guy placed them inside the office fridge now that it's empty and they haven't had any issues, we haven't had to call the maintenance guys, servers are purring like kittens.

I may have underestimated the new guy... I know he's an orc (literally) but he has made some incredible changes in our work environment it only makes sense he takes on this project from now on, boss wasn't happy about how I used to handle things, one thing led to another and I'm now emptying my cubicle, hopefully I'll get a job soon.

I hate you "Goog" but damn... do you make things work!