President Gerald Darryl Hotchkins grew up in a pretty average nuclear family. He was taught pretty firmly what was right and wrong. Taxation is theft, universal healthcare is communism, civil rights were communism, look, a lot of things were communism back when Gerald was growing up. And there was something else Gerald experienced growing up. Reagan era toy selling cartoons. Little Gerald was obsessed with saturday morning cartoon villains. Lex Luthor, Skeletor, Megatron, Starscream, all of them were evil, and all of them were having a great time right up until the hero defeated them. And Gerald wanted in. He wanted chaos. He wanted evil. He wanted destruction.

So, Gerald ran for president. And he ran on everything he was taught was good. Taxation is theft, civil rights are just an excuse people use to riot, universal healthcare is communism (ah, the more things change...), and he was going to bring america back to greatness! At least, that's what he told everyone.

As soon as he got in with his party having a house and senate majority as a bonus, the chaos began. First stop, implementing universal healthcare! Yes, this would throw the whole medical system into chaos! And for a moment, it looked like his plans were paying off. News reports talking about the president's sudden radical politics, podcasters and talk radio hosts freaking out, hell, he even told a bunch of protestors to suck his dick.

And this was only the start. The next thing would totally ruin america. A massive expansion of voting rights! Yesssss, this would allow the illegal immigrants he was hearing about so much to skew elections! Not only that, behold, a massive increase in polling locations! Yes, those minorities he heard about destroying the country will surely drive america off a cliff into drugs and gang violence!

And then, of course, the lynch pin of his plan. Civil Rights. Surely the gays and the blacks and the women with colored hair would lead the country straight down a path of degeneracy and weakness. Behold! A bill massively entrenching and solidifying civil rights more than any bill had previously! This would have the country in flames.

His party went along with everything he did, even as they often gave each other nervous glances and looks of worry behind his back. Yes, the administration was going swimmingly. America was doomed. DOOMED! HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!

4 years later, Gerald was absolutely confused. He didn't know what he had done wrong. He had implemented everything he was taught was communism, was constructed by hippies who hate america. The stuff he put in place was supposed to lead to outright ruination! Degeneracy! Socialism! Communism! What the hell had gone wrong, he'd even heavily taxed corporations as good measure to totally destroy the place! He'd legalized weed! How had that not destroyed everything?

And yet america was... great. Medical services were available and cheap, weed was affordable and available everywhere, people got the jobs they wanted to get, everyone could vote easily, tolerance of all peoples was at an all time high, hell, "reckless government spending" had led to the early discoveries of fusion and a cure for cancer. He had wiped student loan debt and massively increased social spending, thinking it would make people dependent on the government. But as luck would have it, his massive and sweeping restrictions on police brutality that he thought would lead america into a hellhole of gang violence combined with the increase in social spending had actually made people feel safer than ever when protesting. And his massive limitations on corporate spending on politics (with the intent of stifling innovation and growth) had made people feel like they had more of a voice than ever.

He didn't understand. This was supposed to destroy america. This was ALL supposed to destroy america. What had happened?! What went wrong? Sure, the rednecks hated him, but big deal, rednecks hated everyone. Recent polls had him as best president ever, what the hell even happened?

It was the beginning of his second term after a massive, avalanche win for both himself and his party. It was time for his victory speech. He got up on stage, and cleared his throat.

"What the hell did I do wrong?! This was supposed to destroy america! Universal Healthcare was supposed to destroy america! Civil Rights were supposed to lead to a hellhole gangland! Voting rights were supposed to destroy elections! The devil's lettuce was supposed to suck out america's soul! WHAT IN THE HELL HAPPENED?!"

The crowd burst out laughing. In addition to yet another bump in the polls, he was voted comedian of the year that year. He is trapped in a hell of his own making. The good news is, it's heaven for everyone else. America has become the world's poster child for opportunity, human rights, technological innovation, and efficient and effective healthcare.

Isn't it fun to dream, my friends? Isn't it fun to dream?

Rick Scott just gets rowdy sometimes, you know?

Do you think anyone involved in planning this actually thought about that stuff?

Dear god, this is part of the NEOM project? Just when I thought it couldn't get worse.