You're posting in StamfordCT so there's a bias toward Stamford, but maybe for good reason!

I got two general pieces of advice to add to others:

1. If you are south of Wilton then you will have a reverse commute. No traffic going to work and no traffic coming back. You could drive from Stamford to Wilton in under 20 minutes. If you're coming from Bridgeport, it might literally be an hour both ways. Stamford also has an express train to New York City if you want to visit without taking up too much time (45 minutes to Grand Central).

2. I'm from the east coast and lived in California for a few years. I absolutely hated everyone on the west coast. Assuming reverse logic applies, I would guess you may not immediately "appreciate" east coast personalities. Biggest distinguishing factor is people's relationship with politeness. On the West Coast, it's more polite to not be rude. On the East Coast, it's more polite to be honest. California is like everyone is a waiter at a restaurant. You can't distinguish if they're pretending to be nice or actually connect with you. Over here, people will tell you things straight. It can come across as rude or too forward, but it's just a stylistic difference. Especially if you're working with engineers at ASML.

With that in mind, although seasonal depression is a real thing it sounds like something you're overblowing. It's not like we live in Norway where the sun stops coming out for 3 months. It's a little darker and a little colder, but that just provides the opportunity for many indoor activities. I wouldn't be too concerned about that.

If it works out tell him his old tenant in Stamford referred you... cause I need a handyman too lol

My old landlord runs this business: https://www.instagram.com/ji.construction/. I think it's just him and his son. His name is Arthur. I'd check it out and see how you feel.

I haven't used him personally but that's because when I was renting from him he was our point of contact for absolutely everything with the exception of signing the lease which was handled by his wife. She upped our rent by 15% and made some ludicrous demands before we moved out so we kinda exited on bad terms. I wouldn't blame any of that on Arthur though. He was always very reasonable and considerate. He kinda rambles but he was always very straight with me. Has a lot of pride in his work too. Always gets back to you within a day or so. If not, he'll tell you why and give you a more realistic update.

Hey, thanks! I've messaged the mods to pin these kinds of posts to help people out but they never respond.

Oh shit, I didn't know this opened early for these. Nice tip!

That's a great suggestion, but I've already got everything I need in Scarsdale.

Lmao. Sorry your whining isn't based in reality. Maybe you should try being a happier person.

Nothing you've said suggests the fact Stamford has the lowest violent crime per capita is a "myth." You have discovered the concept of geography and population centers — concepts that exist everywhere else too — but they don't impact the data.

On average, in general, Stamford is safer than other cities in New England with a population above 100k. In fact, it is the safest. This does not mean crime doesn't exist. It means if you're looking to buy a house, Stamford is very attractive compared to alternatives (NYC, Bridgeport, New Haven, Norwalk).

Yes, exactly.

The increase in value is the result of property prices going up. If you don't own property (like a home), you're not capturing any of that new wealth. Even if you do own property, you're not capturing the increase until you sell your home. If you purchased a home 10 years ago, then the increase of your property value has resulted in a much higher property tax every 3-4 years (whenever the citywide evaluation is done). So your costs have gone up and you're feeling the squeeze. Unless you sell, which most people don't want to do if they have a life here already. Of course, I would guess most families using FRPL are renting and don't own property.

This is another reason why anti-development is counterintuitive but it's specifically for an argument that rich people don't like. If you build more housing, then property values won't be artificially inflated due to a shortage. This means property values... won't go up as much. Of course, if you're already wealthy and you're living within your means you want property to increase in value so you can get a return on your investment (owning property).

One thing you could do is build more of the "missing middle." Condos and multifamily homes. This is property that renters could reasonably afford without necessarily impacting the property value of homes because people who want homes — outside the city, big yard, away from downtown — don't want a condo. But the city doesn't build those units because they change the "character of the neighborhood." They'll say they care about parking and water/drought, but it just so happens it prevents "poor people" (i.e. someone who is not rich) to move into the neighborhood.

Also minor point, Stamford doesn't fit the definition of gentrification. All of the new housing is built on dilapidated land, brownfields, or formerly industrial zoning. With the exception of the Smith which replaced affordable housing, but that's because the owners sold it since they couldn't maintain it anymore. To the extent people are getting "priced out of their neighborhood" it's because of the lack of housing being built, not because old housing is being replaced with expensive housing.

Look outside of downtown. Classic channels: Facebook marketplace, craigslist, flyers in grocery stores. There is a lot of apartment inventory north of Hoyt Street but you'll never find it by googling "apartments in Stamford." All the big companies dominate search engines. Woodside Green is a good example, but there are many more.

>Then, just to top it off, there are thousands of illegal rentals in Stamford, where someone owns a house and rents out a room or each level, or every room on every level of a house that was meant for a single family.

You are describing a symptom of high cost of housing, not a cause of it.

Pretty straightforward answer

1. People want to live here.
2. The local government is controlled by people who do not want to increase housing.

As a result, the market understands it can price a premium on a limited quantity. New luxury apartments go up and they are reliably more expensive than the previous luxury apartments. They're more expensive because they're "newer," but meanwhile the old inventory isn't having any problems filling up. This is an indication that the slow increase in supply cannot meet the rapid increase in demand.

Why do people want to live in Stamford?

• Very low crime. Stamford is the safest city in New England (municipalities with more than 100k population measured by violent crime per captia, we're the lowest next to Newton, MA). For populated areas, crime negatively correlates with price of housing.
• Modern amenities. Stamford has long referenced that every single resident is within 10 minutes walk from a public park. This is unique to Stamford compared to other metro areas. Pets have become incredibly popular during the pandemic (and they were already popular before then) and having a place to walk your dog is on the high priority for people who want to move somewhere new.
• Access to employment opportunities. Stamford is the last express stop to New York City. You can take a 40 minute train from Stamford's transportation center directly to 125th and Grand Central. That's not true for other surrounding towns (such as Norwalk).
• Access to dating opportunities. UConn Stamford is relatively new but it has produced a "college crowd" of young people who are in the area. Additionally, the luxury apartments naturally attract high-performing, highly mobile, high-earners early in their career. As a result, most of the inventory from luxury apartments tends to be young people commuting to New York City. It creates a huge pool for dating options which is a kind of reinforcing pinwheel for the popularity of the area.

Which is to say, the only way you can decrease the demand is to change these things. Crime goes up, parks become dilapidated, employers leave the area, and therefore people leave the area. None of that is going to happen because the momentum is too strong. Businesses have moved here in droves (more people commute into Stamford than leave), their workforce is coming with them, that increase in residents results in more tax dollars to spend on services like parks maintenance and police.

The only option is to build more housing. Your local board actively fights against that. They complain there's too many cars, too many people, drought problems, and changes to the "character of the neighborhood." They're your problem.

If you want to immerse yourself from a local's perspective this podcast at 24:30 talks about the concept of a "perfect day in Stamford."

Stamford is a nice place to live but not necessarily a touristy town. Not sure if there's something that can distill it's appeal in two days. You could:

• Wake up early to get Lakeside Diner apple cider donuts. (https://goo.gl/maps/PvVX1SHK7HPHwxSr7)
• Walk off the donut with a morning hike at Mianus State Park (before a billion people show up later). I'm talking like 8am at least. Maybe 7am. (https://goo.gl/maps/EFFXwChbCeQM6uGt8)
• Drive to downtown, park at one of the city garages (Bell Street, Summer Street, Bedford Street). You can walk to Third Place (walking under the interstate isn't pictureesque but it's not far from downtown) and spend the early afternoon taking in the neighborhood vibe that's present there. (https://goo.gl/maps/UZWu8acdhMC9H6u7A)
• Around lunch time you can walk down Bedford Street/Summer Street and pick any number of restaurants. I'm linking Kotobuki because it's been in town for decades and is relatively unique compared to other options. (https://goo.gl/maps/8nu349QLpxQWGa9KA).
• You can see a movie at The Avon Theater on Bedford Street if you're into smaller independent films (https://goo.gl/maps/mfEPQ3hk9HhLsyA89) or you can go to the AMC on Summer Street for traditional mainstream films. (https://goo.gl/maps/CWs9tsGyNnJKoBc27).
• Later you can walk on the water at Cove Beach. Parking should be accessible this time of year, but alternatively you can find a side street a few blocks over and walk there. (https://goo.gl/maps/LRcukgd9qB2fB9tT7).
  • You can also go to Scalzi Park, Cummings Park, K Park, or the Bartlett Arboretum. (https://goo.gl/maps/m5aqXcwG6u3KtZ3X8 | https://goo.gl/maps/r9X7EGaFa3Y9qJKa7 | https://goo.gl/maps/SGE433oqmYeQSHtg9 | https://goo.gl/maps/SyGVA2Cp7rRm278Q7)
• If you want an idea of everyday life stuff, you can probably get a tour of Chelsea Piers which has a lot of recreational sports/fitness stuff. (https://goo.gl/maps/rpFHneatpbPDvuVKA)
• You can also see the otters at the Stamford Museum and Nature Center. One of the otters died recently though so there's just two I think. (https://goo.gl/maps/BXQXEgHt8xjf2V937)
• The Palace Theater doesn't typically have great shows but you might luck out and get a C-tier comedian who's not bad. (https://goo.gl/maps/ZnNsR3AD1YhjjWidA)
• Maybe indulge in the local "delicacies":
  • Hot Oil Pizza from Colony Grill or Riko's. (https://goo.gl/maps/P9MmUswLxuDhWtea9 | https://goo.gl/maps/Sczy6nxPYa7gSRA69)
  • Potato Cones from Garden Catering or Reddi Rooster (https://goo.gl/maps/V7Kk7DqUrCWefcW46 | https://goo.gl/maps/Je5qVmoJZDQhz55t6)
  • Bagel from Liz Sue's Bagels (also available at Donut Delight throughout town) (https://goo.gl/maps/V7Kk7DqUrCWefcW46)
• Probably worth mentioning Cafe Silvium which some people refer to as the best restaurant in town. (https://goo.gl/maps/Ujxg5L9AcPbjAWjAA).

I don't think any of these items will blow you away, but it's a decent place to live. If you want the real Stamford experience you can get a hotel here, then travel into New York City every day. Then after spending a little bit of time in Stamford you can leave.

My favorite thing about restaurant week is when you walk in and say "I'm here for restaurant week" and the staff has no idea what you're talking about so you order regular food like any other day. I've only gone twice but it's happened both times at Sienna and Bar Rosso.

Unemployment is also brutally unforgiving. When I was filing I got COVID. It was pretty bad and I was out of commission for a week. Basically a multi-day fever. I missed submitting the "yes, I applied for jobs" message for one week and it negated my entire claim. I had to reapply and start the process over again. Took 2-3 weeks to get approved again. I had to get a personal loan to cover the gap.

I can't imagine why the system would be designed like that short of cruelty toward the unemployed.

The Mecha suggestion is good in terms of keeping the casual "tone" but you'll have to slurp noodles in front of someone you don't know that well. I'd say Flinder's Lane on Summer Street has a similar vibe but more varied menu items (burgers, salad, pasta). The drinks are good too, but you can always leave and walk somewhere else. Depending on how things go you could walk through Mill River Park before choosing how to continue the evening.

As always, Third Place has a very casual vibe. They have a food truck rather than real dinner items, but it's a safe bet imo.

Gotta follow the cultural mecca: Stamford International.

I am certain there are creative people in the city but there is no connective organization. A lot of the art galleries on Franklin Street died out just before COVID and things haven't gotten easier for them. I have personally tried stimulating some arts scene but in my experience the only interested parties are corporate and want to monetize it. For example, a business may off a space for a monthly event but you have to pay a $300 event fee. This may not be a lot if you're a real business, but if you're a rag-tag group of artists — that's prohibitively expensive to stimulate some community.

I'm interested to see how the comedy club at the mall works out. I haven't kept up with Third Place's live events either. There's also been a secret show in the basement of Lorca a handful of times this past month. There could be some developments.

I don't disagree with you but I think this is kind of useless advice? In my experience in Stamford if you approach someone they'll be very guarded and tell you to leave them alone. That's not something you fix by being more outgoing.

People are generally equal parts terrified of 1) being approached by someone they don't know and 2) approaching someone they don't know. That's the world we're in now.

https://s.reddit.com/c/1aet606ls4bul

I don't think this negates OP's critique.

What kind of person can afford to be totally absent from a full-time job for 5 months out of the year? Or even 3 months out of the year? Either people already entrenched in the political system or rich/retired people who make their own hours.

Chez Vous Bistro is my typical recommendation. Kotobuki is also an intimate spot but maybe not what you're looking for.