Mysterious_Bee8811

Mysterious_Bee8811 t1_jeeuxdp wrote

This is a toxic relationship for both you and your boyfriend.

>My boyfriend keeps constantly bringing up going on breaks (I don’t believe in them) or breaking up

He's trying to break up with you, without seeming to be the bad guy. It's best if you break up with him. Playing mind games is toxic, and not something you need.

6

Mysterious_Bee8811 t1_jadd4ge wrote

I'm confused. .

>I’ve noticed that if I [f30] say anything negative about myself to my long term partner [m30] when I’m in a rough place, he actually goes in his head like “oh she’s right, she IS blah blah”.

So why are you lying to him about your insecurities? Why are you trying to get him to say "no no, you're not.."?

> If I say something about myself, he won’t say “oh that’s not true”,

Why would he belittle your feelings or reject them? And why would you want that?

>. This makes me feel that I can’t share worries or vulnerabilities with him.

How are you phrasing your worries or vulnerabilities?

>This does trigger my abandonment issues, and I don’t know what to do

You have issues. Seek therapy.

> I’m being ignored

How is he ignoring you? What triggered him to start ignoring you?

>And it’s triggering me.

And what happens when you're "triggered"?

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Mysterious_Bee8811 t1_ja6p316 wrote

I suggest learning how to control your emotions. Learn to let the past be the past. This comes from experience, from self reflection, and from growth.

Honestly, I suggest getting outside of your comfort zone. Visit/ move to another country as a long term resident. Do new experiences, like skydiving, or learn new skills like Scuba diving. Fail. Get up. Dust yourself off. Do it again.

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Mysterious_Bee8811 t1_iyc8aul wrote

16 and you want to give her a ring? You're sure she likes jewelry, right? I know in America girls who aren't into jewelry may find a ring to be a big turn off.

I'd recommend getting something that's related to her interests:

- A keychain with something she's interested in (favorite city, or animal, or something)

- Simple flowers

- Something homemade

I don't know, you know her much better than we do. What's the budget? And why did you chose to buy her a ring anyway?

1