This 110% man. It sucks, but you have to deal with reality. And the reality is, she is not the loving, caring partner you deserve. She is now in dorect competition with you for ypur happiness. She is not a full blown enemy because you need to be as cordial as possible for the kids to have the best life they can; but she is not a teammate in life either.

Do what is best for you and your kids.

Holy cow, TIL I guess. I always thought contribution limits were inclusive of company match contributions.

Guess I need to read up!