Women of DC

Submitted by Inferno_Crazy t3_10pihny in washingtondc

Lawyer: Is smarter than you. Asked you to schedule date out 4 weeks in advance and does not think that's weird. Texts you back 3 business days later. Grills you about your resume the entire first date. Offers to pay for stuff. Leaves in Uber black. 5/10 conversationalist.

Consultant: Former sorority girl. Definitely more competent than her male counterpart. Can be found at happy hour. Is a yeller when drunk. Probably cute. Possibly insane. Usually fun.

NGO: Weirdly nice. Looks down morally on your job. Does not budge when bill comes for dinner. Usually has a boyfriend.

Hill Staffer: Thinks work they do is very important. Fetched coffee that day. Talks A LOT. Must know your political views. Makes no money but is somehow always going to bars and eating out. Has 6 roommates or parents pay rent.

Embassy Chick: Speaks 5 languages. Will show up in random places. Comes to your place one time. Wants to go clubbing. Will make out with you and disappear like Batman.

The Project Manager: Very stressed out. Very busy answering email. Cannot fully explain job description. Is either running fortune 500 company or borderline incompetent. Impossible to get a hold of. Needs Xanax prescription.

Engineer: Again smarter than you. Rarest of them all. Usually chill.

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Soggy-Yogurt6906 t1_j6kmyns wrote

So uhh... How's the dating going, bud?

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Inferno_Crazy OP t1_j6kn88p wrote

Clearly doing a lot of it lol. Mostly fun, have some good stories.

I see a post like this about "guys of DC" every other day on insta. Figured I would make my own.

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Soggy-Yogurt6906 t1_j6kph2o wrote

I feel you. I'm trying to just get out there and do stuff and maybe meet someone by happenstance.

Best of luck to you in your adventures!

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DC-DE t1_j6kqbiv wrote

I've got a friend who has had luck finding someone via the Hinge app.

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ProdigiousNewt07 t1_j6lks2w wrote

Would you like to try dating a chronically poor (like qualifies for Medicaid poor), slightly chubby, straight edge, vegetarian tr*nny with mild anxiety and depression? You'll most likely lose massive social capital (even among self-proclaimed "progressives"), but you'll gain somebody who is more likely to share your more male-dominated hobbies and who will think it's pretty cool that you earn a consistent income at all, regardless of career.

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BansheeLoveTriangle t1_j6kyer2 wrote

I've had a weird trend in my dating where the more socially conscious-focused a lawyer's job is, the worse they've treated me/been on dates - while the more reprehensible their law focus is the nicer and easier to date they've been.

Need to find one that represents fossil fuel industry/Nestle with a side hustle of defending African war lords or something.

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IcyWillow1193 t1_j6l3hb1 wrote

I once read a management book which claimed that do-gooder organizations tend to have more management problems than others, because they think their superior mission absolves them of having to address any sins and shortcomings. Maybe the same is true of people.

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BansheeLoveTriangle t1_j6la7sm wrote

It's not like my sample size is extensive, but it was enough to start getting that feeling haha - interesting though

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uninvitedthirteenth t1_j6mp7fe wrote

I’m not gonna say I represent war lords but… my friends do all give me a hard time about what kind of law I do

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BlueCollarGuru t1_j6l15bx wrote

Dude I used to mount tires for a living. I’m as dense as I look. My wife has a masters. Shoot your shot and be yourself.

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Awkotaco95 t1_j6ljqyj wrote

You should broaden the engineer category to scientists in general. There's plenty of scientists that are smart and chill!

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romulusjsp t1_j6o5kmx wrote

I make an unspeakable amount of money writing memos that nobody will ever read. The lanyard stays on during sex.

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camelot478 t1_j6mbzsy wrote

Lol spot on! It's hard to get to know people working on their career. It's one of the reasons why DC dating can be so lonely and noncommittal.

Best bets are with locals or others who aren't here just for work. There's a whole side to DC that isn't in the government-work orbit and they are some of the best people I've met in the country. Conscious of issues and government, but not absorbed in it, and more likely to put other things in life first.

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DC-DE t1_j6kon95 wrote

Always pick the engineer :)

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PsychologicalItem437 t1_j6lcr3c wrote

This is the way. The odds are good but the goods are odd.

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Offal t1_j6n0lz7 wrote

> The odds are good but the goods are odd.

Thank you for this!

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Papadapalopolous t1_j6komj8 wrote

No military women yet?

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Inferno_Crazy OP t1_j6kpaia wrote

Not yet, but if one wants to order me around I wouldn't mind

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missesT1 t1_j6l1j1e wrote

Ah I see you’re in the turned on by military woman camp. It’s either that or emasculated in my experience, so you’re definitely in the better camp.

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aup123 t1_j6mwfc9 wrote

I casually hung out with a reservist officer and she was wild and fun, and then a few enlisted girls and they were all depressed and talked about the SSRI's they were prescribed... and all of them were just hoping to get orders to go to Europe.

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Maximum-Escape-8071 t1_j6kqn1u wrote

Oh no, pretty sure I just realized I’m the weirdly nice one. Fuck

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ChessieChesapeake t1_j6l5bln wrote

I work with a lot of female Consultants, PMs, and Engineers. Your descriptions are very accurate, and it's universal, not just in DC.

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KinNortheast t1_j6lf2ey wrote

Add MLM madam. She is one of the above and she’s a hustler.

Alas, I was just another rung on her ladder to financial independence

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districtsyrup t1_j6m66kv wrote

I cannot express how unfunny this is

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Mindless-Employment t1_j6nx8le wrote

>The Project Manager: Very stressed out. Very busy answering email.

Eeek. Suddenly made me remember the project manager I had a couple of jobs ago. She worked remotely most of the time and everyone dreaded the days when she was in person at the office. She was bad enough to deal with on the phone. She insisted that she be CC'd on EVERY email that anyone in my group sent to anyone at the agency or to each other. She got bent out of shape one day because she said I hadn't notified her about something. I replied that I'd sent her an email about it. She then acted as if it was absurd to expect her to have seen my email because "I get over 200 emails a day!"

I thought that it just *felt* to me like this woman was yelling when she talked, even on the phone, because I just hated being around her so much. But one day one of the legal assistants, who sat several offices away, asked "Why is she always yelling? It stresses me out and she's not even talking to me."

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rafdaman15 t1_j6krgee wrote

Lol date a Medical resident

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shiraz410 t1_j6l1w40 wrote

how would they find the time? and when they do, are you ready for a 3am date?

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unenlightenedgoblin t1_j6nrek0 wrote

Lol from experience avoid the lawyers. A litigious ex is an absolute nightmare.

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Snoo-33261 t1_j6ko658 wrote

Why would she pay for the first date? You asked her out. You sound judgy over the Hill staffer. No shit they don’t make any money lol

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VodgeDiper_10 t1_j6lnqml wrote

>You asked her out.

Either I missed something or lol at the accidental sexist assumption

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sly_python t1_j6kyt40 wrote

Yeah I gotta agree here. Six roommates and overworked below $50k salary, can they even afford the time to date you?

Now if both people on the date are hill staffer and broke, well....park walks are free. BYOB

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LakeLifeTL t1_j6mra58 wrote

Thankfully, I found an adorable country girl with a heart of gold in the middle of all this mess in my late 40s.

When I first moved here I dated this one woman who was unemployed and living off of a trust from her parents. She had a PhD in something or other (that her parents paid for), and asked me "Will it be OK if I am making more money than you when I get a job?". I thought to myself, "Bitch, you're unemployed, living off of your parents money and are in your late 40s. Feel free to try to impress me."

I was a GS-13 at the time and 20 years into my career with a pension to look forward to. I'm also the type of guy that would happily be into a relationship with someone that made more money than me, but the way she asked that question made me feel like she was looking down on me.

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klubkouture t1_j6lft1f wrote

Why don't you find someone and tell her your needs instead of dating everyone for insta/reddit/social attention?

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