Sounds like the perfect opportunity for a 2022 update of a Gonzo Journalism expose.

"We had 2 bags of K2, 75 pellets of Adderall, five sheets of something our Chinese bitcoin merchant assured us was high-power blotter acid, a salt shaker 1/10th full of sepped on cocaine and 90% full of fentanyl and baby powder, and a whole galaxy of completely untested illegal research chemicals. Also a quart of Fireball, a quart of Rumchata, a case of Truly lite seltzer, a pint of raw kombucha, and two dozen redbulls and cans of axe body spray.

Not that we needed it all for the trip, but once you start buying the nasty shit your girlfriends always want at Tick Tock Liquors, the tendency is to drink 1/4 of what you bought and stash the rest in the car in an ever-growing stockpile nobody will ever finish."