Submitted by nyc2bad t3_10kx8hv in wallstreetbets
Comments
gamesexposed t1_j5t9a1d wrote
No assholes and no sinks? How is anyone supposed to take a shit?
tothemoonandback01 t1_j5ta4gj wrote
He's practising, the Wendy's dumpster for Elon, soon..
geovra t1_j5ta707 wrote
There is only enough room for one asshole at SpaceX/Tesla/Twitter
PR_Guayan t1_j5tb1y4 wrote
No assholes, dicks only
n1ck90z t1_j5tbw3m wrote
Did he had to leave?
tiffanylockhart t1_j5tbxcg wrote
is that why he is focusing mostly on twitter now?
Due_Worker_1476 t1_j5tc71s wrote
Let that sink in.
Popular_District9072 t1_j5teikk wrote
my company has alike policy, and assholes do slip in regardless
xtrmist t1_j5tesne wrote
Understandable. Elon is asshole enough for everybody.
carsonthecarsinogen t1_j5tgam2 wrote
Gimme that gold hedge boi
Live-Ad6746 t1_j5tgn84 wrote
It’s funny cuz he is one
Tnuvu t1_j5thhch wrote
From the amount of kids he has with all those women, I have to agree...he sure ain't an ass man
gamesexposed t1_j5ti47x wrote
Can't have shit in Detroit
AntiHyperbolic t1_j5tj6ov wrote
We're dicks! We're reckless, arrogant, stupid dicks. And the {FED} are pussies. And {Jerome Powell} is an asshole. Pussies don't like dicks, because pussies get fucked by dicks. But dicks also fuck assholes: assholes that just want to shit on everything. Pussies may think they can deal with assholes their way. But the only thing that can fuck an asshole is a dick, with some balls. The problem with dicks is: they fuck too much or fuck when it isn't appropriate — and it takes a pussy to show them that. But sometimes, pussies can be so full of shit that they become assholes themselves... because pussies are an inch and half away from assholes. I don't know much about this crazy, crazy world, but I do know this: If you don't let us fuck this asshole, we're going to have our dicks and pussies all covered in shit!
- Elon, maybe?
Ancient-Tadpole8032 t1_j5tk2vl wrote
Who photoshopped a dildo into Musk’s hands?
Old_Part_9619 t1_j5tl95m wrote
How many assholes we got on this ship anyhow?
SnooGoats8448 t1_j5tn2lc wrote
who is getting that rocket up their ass?
gunnarbird t1_j5tpd0b wrote
Can someone PLEASE change that rocket to a dildo
nyc2bad OP t1_j5tpnbw wrote
...thats the SpaceO dildo
DatsunDom t1_j5tr9t7 wrote
They sew you up at orientation.
Disastrous_Care_5443 t1_j5tucmi wrote
Stock sank as soon as WS read he kept it public for Cathy LMAO
McMarkyMarkMark t1_j5tumlk wrote
It says assholes. They’re allowed to have one
Beachtrader007 t1_j5tupeb wrote
Please dont be on the earnings call, please dont be on the earnings call.
mdneilson t1_j5tv83l wrote
I worked at a place that "didn't hire assholes". This was my exact take, the CEO was enough of a dick to cover everyone.
xtrmist t1_j5twbwt wrote
Didn't want competition, right?
AltruisticYam7670 t1_j5twnyc wrote
Is that his anal plug in his hands?
FarmerAndy88 t1_j5two9o wrote
One of the greatest movie quotes of all time. Seriously never seen a better sex scene in any movie.
M_star_killer t1_j5twukc wrote
Sook: He does not have a butt hole. He has no need for one.
retardedastronaut t1_j5u0f01 wrote
If there is no ass hole how do they crap on share holders ?
beepatr t1_j5u0idj wrote
It's a "No assholes" policy, not a "no asshole" policy.
Elon can never handle competition.
throwawayamd14 t1_j5u0sxs wrote
Lol, amongst engineers Elon is notorious. No one wants to work for him, all he gets is new grads or people who post TikToks. The real quality engineers are not working at any of elons companies
RockmanMike t1_j5u0t5n wrote
He said "assholes" as in plural; so he, himself can be the only "asshole" (singular) in the company.
rupert20201 t1_j5u14sj wrote
That goes in line with no toilet breaks longer than 30 seconds. Can’t take a shit with no arsehole can ya ?
AntiHyperbolic t1_j5u1czt wrote
It would be impossible to have a better sex scene.
[deleted] t1_j5u20sg wrote
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[deleted] t1_j5u2zld wrote
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gym_brah81 t1_j5u5el8 wrote
Elon's holding a dildo, so I'm gonna say this is a real quote
[deleted] t1_j5u73ni wrote
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mrmadmusic t1_j5uayo9 wrote
Because that rocket looks like it would hurt an asshole
DariusMarius00 t1_j5ud937 wrote
And where do he put the dildo in his hands in?
ClydeFroagg t1_j5udf7r wrote
maybe take the fins off the nose and try again?
Cattaphract t1_j5uf238 wrote
Why is he holding a dildo?
[deleted] t1_j5ugxu0 wrote
[deleted]
Proper-Snow-911 t1_j5uiw2w wrote
So I guess anal is out of the question
johndsmits t1_j5ukwt9 wrote
I guess GeoHot is evidence. Lasted what, 5 weeks?
Necessary-Onion-7494 t1_j5uld95 wrote
Dirka dirka ?
throwawayamd14 t1_j5uldpm wrote
Surprised he even made that. Tesla cons fresh grad engineers with their strong marketing strategy.
Every experienced engineer thinks to themself “why would I work twice as many hours for 75% of my current pay?”
Otheus t1_j5umgh9 wrote
Plural! We're allowed to have one... Elon himself
ETH_Knight t1_j5utexu wrote
Since you seem to not recognize it. It s beautiful.
RockDiamondSissors t1_j5v0rcz wrote
That’s why he’s a hands off CEO
muncher21 t1_j5v2cn3 wrote
Tom mueller = new grad who posts TikTok’s 😂😂😂
throwawayamd14 t1_j5v347s wrote
That guy left spacex and started his own company instead of going back.
Are you trying to use a guy who was developing engines for Elon but quit and started developing them at his own company instead as an example of talent retention?
CorruptedFrogs t1_j5v7mhs wrote
just hide your asshole with tape until you get home.
WroughtenPS2 t1_j5vbyx4 wrote
Colostomy bags required
Hungry-Weakness8417 t1_j5vdhof wrote
Every boss that's ever said that never offers pay rises and loses their best workers
madflash711 t1_j5ve149 wrote
With their rocket’s profile it is probably safer for the assholes if they stay puckered and out of sight.
Repulsive-Lake1753 t1_j5vf4nd wrote
There can be only one.
muncher21 t1_j5vf5a0 wrote
>That guy left spacex and started his own company instead of going back.
After working there for 19 years...
Repulsive-Lake1753 t1_j5vf5wg wrote
....in semen.
Repulsive-Lake1753 t1_j5vfalv wrote
I don't know, that assumes only one orgasm an evening. Maybe he IS an ass man but he's also INCREDIBLY fertile.
Repulsive-Lake1753 t1_j5vfbhz wrote
InfiniteBagholder t1_j5vh8ld wrote
Sounds like you're speaking from experience
throwawayamd14 t1_j5vijnm wrote
Ah I see, your past posts is just sucking Elon’s dick. Here’s a ground report for you. I’m an engineer, I have friends from college who have worked in Elon’s companies (spacex). Guess what, it’s fucking awful. They all get paid less than engineers at other large companies and work 80 hours instead of 40 hours. Just people like you can’t tell the difference between Elon’s sperm and marketing and think it’s a great place to work.
HellScratchy t1_j5vk352 wrote
people without an asshole:
Zakkana t1_j5vk5jx wrote
So he’s left the company?
muncher21 t1_j5vkm5f wrote
Observ1 t1_j5vmza8 wrote
Says the largest asshole.
TNT-Tonnessen t1_j5vns1l wrote
What movie is this?
Max_Seven_Four t1_j5vrucj wrote
Well, man doesn't likes competition.
throwawayamd14 t1_j5vtjxu wrote
You started posting defending him and his companies the same day you made this account, over a year ago. And have just done that consistently since then
muncher21 t1_j5vuxrt wrote
matterson22070 t1_j5vw1j5 wrote
Well......another dream of mine shattered.
Fart_Barfington t1_j5vwytz wrote
This quote is taken out of context. He was explaining why he took away everyone's bathroom breaks.
No-plot-twist t1_j5vx0qp wrote
discrimination against people with multiple buttholes, reported
Positive_Wheel_7065 t1_j5vxrxd wrote
You had me at "Dicks fuck Assholes"
flying_cofin t1_j5vxves wrote
What about the CEO, he seems to be the biggest one imo 😅
AlwaysSeekAdventure t1_j5w0vx5 wrote
Lol yet the largest asshole is the figurehead of the company, makes sense!
Public-Angle82 t1_j5w9rjf wrote
He definitely shoved that up his butt
BackgroundPrompt3111 t1_j5wb8nu wrote
Fuck yeah!
Mr_Hassel t1_j5wbyxg wrote
Then why are you there? LOL
Silent-Jelly-6567 t1_j5we4rm wrote
does he not see the irony?
NewChemistryPlanets t1_j5ww02r wrote
How do you take a crap at SpaceX? With this realization, a much more interesting question than 'how do you go to the bathroom in space?'
NicoCrestmere t1_j5x0ova wrote
50yo edgelords are fine though.
Klutzy_Jicama_401 t1_j5xhzlq wrote
gnocchicotti t1_j5xm5qz wrote
They play by Kim Jong Un rules
getonurkneesnbeg t1_j60lgy2 wrote
That’s why he’s holding his custom made butt plug. Insert and the asshole disappears!
BrainSqueezins t1_j62fzii wrote
Old_Part_9619 t1_j647ri7 wrote
I knew it.... im surrounded by assholes!
penguin_2345 t1_j5t96vt wrote
Cradling the balls and stroking the shaft… just how daddy likes it….