I have pretty bad IBS so when I have to go, I have to go NOW. Took my gf, now wife - surprising after this story, to a nice dinner in Georgetown (back when we both worked in DC) and on the way back to my apartment it hit me. I had to go immediately and thus parked the car and scurried into the bushes to do so. This was at, like, 8 at night. And right in front of the US Department of Energy. It wasn't quick, either. I was hunkered down for probably 20 minutes. Finished my biz and left. Tried to play it cool with the girl and she was like, "You know there's cameras everywhere." Had to laugh thinking of security watching that scene in the morning.

Oh well. Gump was right. Shit happens.