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iceyed913 t1_iuieuw0 wrote

Never knew that hemorrhoids had a marketing team.. what about the cold sores?

38

dumbleydore94 t1_iuiiuxb wrote

If you've never had one (god forbid multiple) you'd understand. There should be a colored ribbon for hemorrhoid awareness.

18

Geofferz t1_iuio2so wrote

They're making a joke that there's a company who promotes hemmeroids. Instead of hemmeroids cream.

10

cardboardunderwear t1_iujerb6 wrote

if you’re putting food on your table by selling hemorrhoid cream then it’s in your best interest to promote both isn’t it

5

leopard_tights t1_iujz0cd wrote

The first time I had one I almost fainted on the way to the toilet.

I then remembered a commercial about one of these creams that pictured a lady sitting in a red hot cooking mesh coil. People in those commercials really undersell how bad it can be. I've been several times without moving from bed because of it. On the other hand when I applied the cream I experimented instant relief, and I mean instant. It felt like magic.

2

dumbleydore94 t1_iuiin5a wrote

Hemorrhoids feel more like someone's shoving a cactus up your butt, or like someone's driving a very large screw up your butt.

Personally as someone with hemorrhoids, I'd have laughed so hard at a commercial like that, it'd hurt my ass, it'd be absolutely hilarious.

30

jmoney6 OP t1_iuijbji wrote

Would you laugh your ass off at it?

11

foul_ol_ron t1_iujeor2 wrote

Ah, but would it hurt enough that you'd race to the shop to buy the haemorrhoid cream? If so, it's successful marketing!

2

samx3i t1_iuif577 wrote

The lyrics are fucked up if we're using "ring of fire" as a metaphor for an inflamed asshole:

>Love is a burning thing

>And it makes a fiery ring

>Bound by wild desire

>I fell into a ring of fire

[chorus]

>I fell into a burning ring of fire

>I went down, down, down

>And the flames went higher

>And it burns, burns, burns

>The ring of fire

>The ring of fire

17

KiaPe t1_iujeoo8 wrote

> if we're using "ring of fire" as a metaphor for an inflamed asshole

Why'd you drag Elon Musk into this conversation?

11

RedSonGamble t1_iujexw8 wrote

To go down into an asshole wouldn’t the person need to be upside down?

−1

samfreez t1_iuif3ty wrote

As long as you don't pay attention to the lyrics, it makes sense. If you do, however......

>Love is a burning thing

>And it makes a fiery ring

>Bound by wild desire

>I fell into a ring of fire

>I fell into a burning ring of fire

>I went down, down, down

>And the flames went higher

>And it burns, burns, burns

>The ring of fire

>The ring of fire

@_@

3

42tfish t1_iuiimgm wrote

Maybe better suited for a Vaseline commercial.

1

Handpaper t1_iuja0cn wrote

Nah.

This one for Vaseline.

1

jmoney6 OP t1_iujdaeg wrote

at 19 I crashed my first car. Hummed 'Nationwide just fucked me dry' for about a week.

1

42tfish t1_iujb1a9 wrote

Hahahaha someone needs to pair this with a Vaseline commercial…if there are Vaseline commercials, idk.

0

Philboyd_Studge t1_iuipu5q wrote

Zappa already did it

Edit: sorry, all the hemorrhoid jokes come in a little later in the show

3

z7q2 t1_iujld1p wrote

Came here to reference this, gave you the updoot you deserve.

1

Philboyd_Studge t1_iujppe2 wrote

I'll give some background, Zappa was doing a show in 1988 and Johnny Cash was supposed to show up and play Ring of Fire with them, but his wife got sick and he couldn't make it. They did the song anyway, and then the rest of the night the whole band threw out different ring of fire/hemorrhoid jokes into several other songs.

3

3971_KTL t1_iuikxj7 wrote

Am I misremembering or wasn't it in a Pepto commercial?

0

SwallowYourDreams t1_iuiln15 wrote

Incorrect usage. It's the right song for chili commercials, not hemorrhoids.

0

bolanrox t1_iuj47cb wrote

There is a ring of fire hot sauce

−1

AnabolicCheesecake t1_iuipxo3 wrote

I used to work with a guy who would sing all day long. Every time he sang Ring of Fire he would mention this fact and that he refused

−1

HPmoni t1_iuirjpp wrote

It was in a Burger King commercial, so it was both ends.

−1

80burritospersecond t1_iuiwrcr wrote

I'm pretty sure Springsteen wrote Cover Me with intentions of selling it to an insurance company later on.

−1

LipTrev t1_iuje8ok wrote

Wall of Voodoo cover of Ring of Fire:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=HZn6Y1JWksM

This cover set them on their path of synth music for Westerns culminating in Call of the West, a brilliant album, most popularly know for Mexican Radio.

Mexican Radio:https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=eyCEexG9xjw

But the most inspired song on the album is the title track closing the album

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=D2T5W3dMt74

Brilliant, brilliant music.

−1