Submitted by FeedTheWrongWolf t3_10pnwe9 in tifu

He's 13 and very smart and mature for his age and I'm a young parent. He's honestly my best friend. Anyway....

I have some bad adhd. Here's how it happened.

The kid was messing with me and I started to say "awe come on" I stuttered and stopped and he said
"Were you gonna call me the c word?"

"What c word? Cunt?"

"No dad the other one."

"Cum?"

"No c-o-c-k."

" Oh, cock." I said and laughed to myself aloud "Why did I say cum?"

"idk, why did you say that?"

This is where the add comes in. It just started coming out of my mouth "Because, you're a.... Nope. Nope. Nope."

I stopped myself initially, sometimes things start to come out and I stop myself. Everyone always insists that I finish. People even tend to get upset if I don't. Even when I assure them that it's something that should never be said and it was just an impulse. That I was right to fight it down and that I'm trying to be a good person.

The kid badgered me until finally I said it. "Because you're a cum pet! There ya happy ya little jizz goblin?!"......

Now he's mad that I would call him something so hurtful..... Bro... I didn't want to say it.... Sorry bout the 'jizz goblin' thing.

Tldr: it just kinda slipped out I called my 13 yr old kid a cum pet to his face.

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Killb0t47 t1_j6liquf wrote

ROFL. That is honestly hilarious. He will probably be mad till he comes up with a good zinger. My mom and I would do that sometimes. But it doesn't hurt to make sure he is ok.

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Unounofive t1_j6n7di5 wrote

I mean I call mine a “sex trophy” I get it

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