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redbucket75 t1_j6lfxjb wrote

Time to sit down, well she can stand, and have that conversation about limits and safe words. This wasn't any issue of consent, just a bad sexual experience, and you'll both get through it if you want to stay together.

You should also talk about safe ways to initiate punishment sessions. Burning down the house or making actual poor life choices doesn't get sexy spanking, it gets boring discussions about grown up decision making.

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ZerotheWanderer t1_j6lpshe wrote

Yeah, almost burning down your house or apartment does not get you sexy time, you're not getting rewarded for almost causing tens of thousands of dollars worth of damage and permanently changing your lives.

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joacoleon t1_j6n07jv wrote

> well she can stand

LMAO

> You should also talk about safe ways to initiate punishment sessions

Right? I was under the impression these ways were supposed to be playful and harmless, and not things that can get you fired or hurt. Like, whats next? Cheating?

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redbucket75 t1_j6n149q wrote

There's a group of people, men and women, who take this beyond kink and consciously try to "correct" women's behavior with corporal punishment. My guess is the girlfriend is into spanking and stumbled into this culture online, and seeing it as a way to fulfill her kink suggested it to her boyfriend. But that's a (fucked up) lifestyle that isn't just about sex, it's about treating women like abused children. I can see an appeal, it excuses her from any responsibility since it assumes she cannot make decisions without 'training', but she's probably struggling with the whole concept. Hopefully they can work together to figure out how to meet her kink desires separately from the work she needs to do to live a responsible adult life.

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