I’m so sorry that you’re having to go through this. But right now you need to focus on you. You need to figure out why you had a psychosis episode and what brought you to that point and get help. You need to work on you.

I hate to say this (because you are hurting so bad right now) but your boyfriend is allowed to make his own choices and live the life he wants. If in the future IF he would like to talk to you that’s on his accord but what you did, how you acted, I don’t think you understand the entirety of it and what it did to him.

People are allowed to not want to be around people who have psychotic episodes or breakdown. Even though something medically could explain it, there are a lot of people when put in those situations are like “nope! Peace out!”

Even though you had a great relationship, your life is what needs focus now. Not repairing something irreparable. This is your growth period now. Focus on you, therapy, medication etc to get you back to a good place. Allow yourself to grieve the end of the relationship. Sometimes they just end without any explanation and ghost you. In this case it ended because a HUGE traumatic situation happened. Just walk away and work on you.