Did she give you any indication that she was into you? You know flirting, touching you excessively, you do the same thing with her prior, giving you “fuck me eyes”. Basically, did you both escalate to the point where you were sure she was attracted to you? Like would you have been confident that if you went for a kiss she would want it?

I’ll be honest, it’s hard to gauge how much you fucked up considering the circumstance. You two had been talking a lot, like bf/gfs do. She opened up to you and I suspect she had feelings for you. She wanted you to spend the night and laid mattresses next to each other. Now I have no idea if those were the only sleeping options, but, why didn’t she just sleep in her bed and you on the couch? Did she have to lay both mattress next to each other? To me laying mattress next to each other when not needed is fishing for something considering how long you two had been talking to one another. If she had been flirting with you, dropping hints, touching you excessively, etc,., then I frankly wouldn’t blame you touching her out of being an idiot. Actually, that was pretty stupid even if the situation was how I laid it out. You’d want to at least stare into her eyes and read her face if she was interested in you and then mutually lean in for a kiss, then escalate from there. You didn’t though, you just went for it and groped her chest which was dumb. I actually think if you went at it differently you two could have actually developed something for the fact that she said she didn’t mind you touching her boobs and the other reasons I mentioned. Basically, I think she might have been interested in you but was cautious not ready for anything and you like an impulse dumbass couldn’t respect that and jumped the gun before she let it known to you through her actions or words that she was interested in escalating things. You apologized and she’s upset. I would frankly drop it at this point. Leave her alone, talking to her anymore will only make things worse. If she wants yo hear from you again she’ll reach out to you. If that happens, all you can do is be honest and tell her exactly what was going through your head when it happened. I know a lot of people here are giving you a lot of shit, but while I think you did fuck up and did cross the line, it wasn’t out of malice. She was no angel herself. A woman doesn’t invite a guy for a sleepover, then sleeps next to him when she has an option not to do so (I’m assuming she slept next to you out of choice and not out of necessity), and not at least have feelings for him. You obviously realized your fuck up and maybe she can learn from this situation as well, like don’t sleep next to a guy you’ve been talking for hours everyday for months who you invited for a sleepover, and then slept next to him. People will say don’t victim blame, but being realistic she fucked too and hopefully she learns to be less trusting of men in situations like those unless she’s interested in him sexually. You feel awful about this, you don’t seem like a predator, just a young dumb kid, no reason to go off into the deep end and think of ending your life. You stopped after being told to do so. You have a conscious, you’re not a heartless monster. Learn from this, respect women’s choices, and don’t just assume she’s ready for something even if she seems interested in it.