>He got so mad he started getting abusive.

I'm curious how bad it actually was. Did he scream and yell or did he start calling her names or did he start breaking things... or hitting her?

Screaming and yelling isn't necessarily abusive. Calling her names? Well, it's bad but depends how far. Physical, even breaking things, is abuse, 100%.

I can fully understand someone getting very angry about their partner sitting around all day and not helping out while they're stressing about trying to feed and house you both while working 2 jobs. Can't say I'm on OP's side necessarily. Sounds like she should be trying harder to get a job.