TIFU by trying to call out sick: a fever dream saga.

Submitted by DreyaNova t3_z5ip4m in tifu

So I’ve been hit with the awful flu that’s going around, it just hit me all at once about 24 hours ago. High fever, shivering like crazy, worst headache and sore throat of my life. Did a Covid test but it came back negative, so I figured I should just pound cold medicine and coconut water and get some sleep to try and get in to work today.

I set an alarm for 7AM, just in case I didn’t feel well enough to work so I could call my company staffing line and give them time to find someone else to cover for me.

7AM rolls around, I feel like death, I’m sweating buckets and I’m completely freezing. So I call the staffing hotline half awake and mumble feverishly about not being able to make my shift.

The guy on the other end of the phone sounded really angry, and I couldn’t quite make out what he was saying? So I just said “Okay thank you bye bye.” hung up and went back to sleep.

About…. 8 hours later I wake up again, and instantly I’m slightly haunted by the weird phone call. He’s usually such a nice guy, I don’t know why he’d be so mad at me for calling out sick. We have lots of casual employees who cover sick days, it’s not a big deal. So I chalk it up to a fever dream. He’s probably not mad at all, I’m probably just delirious.

About 30 minutes ago, I open up my phone to call my Ma and complain about dying from the flu. At which point in time I notice that I actually made 4 outgoing calls to the staffing office this morning between 5:48-7AM. And I can only remember one of them.

This leads me to believe that I managed to heroically and deliriously call out of work 4 times in a row. Dude probably thought I was completely blackout drunk, which is very unfair because I was just high on cold medicine and feverish. I’m never going to live this down. FML.

TLDR; Got wicked stoned on cough medicine and in a fever induced delirium managed to call my boss 4 separate times asking for the day off.

Update! Guess who has Mono!!!! Yaaaaaaaay.

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Comments

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cyanidelemonade t1_ixwgkqs wrote

Well at least they can't fault you for being thorough!

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dieforestmusic t1_ixwuo5s wrote

I was worried that your call was a actually a dream, so this doesn't seem so bad. imo better to be annoying than to no-call-no-show.

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SkyScamall t1_ixx1hfy wrote

I was fully expecting OP to have dreamt it and no-showed at work.

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i_worstofall t1_ixx25pn wrote

Yeah, I just tapped on this notification because the title reminded me of a time I called out sick, and then settled back into my sweaty, feverish, nightmarish fugue, relieved I’d gotten that out of the way; the next day I discovered I only THOUGHT I’d called out. Accidentally pulled a no-call-no-show. I still cringe about it.

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omegatotal t1_ixxlop9 wrote

shit like this is why I call out the day before if I start feeling sick, including text messages my boss, and tell them if I feel better in the morning I'll make it in otherwise, don't expect me.

anytime they say text messages are not 'legitimate' way to call out, I just be like well it's documented that I sent it, and you reach out to me via text give me instructions so..

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aasdfhdjkkl t1_ixxty4j wrote

I always call in sick the night before because otherwise I might have to wake up early for no reason. Plus, that way my boss knows I'm not coming in as soon as she shows up to work at the ass-crack of dawn. I work at a daycare so knowing how many employees will be there is extremely important for legal reasons.

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superjanna t1_ixybe3k wrote

I can call out via email, in fact it’s preferred so we have written time stamped confirmation from both staffer and supervisor! And I will use “schedule send” in gmail the night before so I don’t have to wake up

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Raichu7 t1_ixytxuc wrote

That’s great if you start feeling sick the day before, but if you wake up feeling sick how were you supposed to have predicted the future?

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evileyeball t1_ixxpmqu wrote

I've called in sick twice in my life and I would not have the second time if my wife hadn't forced my hand knowing I was sicker than I believed I was (I thought I could do it sick because I work from home and wouldnt get anyone else sick)

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bigCinoce t1_ixylsfb wrote

If you work from home you don't really have to call in sick..

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XMilkyMoo t1_ixysnjn wrote

You can be too sick to do your job properly even if contagion isn't a worry. I'd hate to be on a call with a client while loopy from a fever.

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harpejjist t1_ixy0ofr wrote

In my case it WAS a dream so I had to keep trying over and over. Kept waking up to realize I had only dreamt calling. It was brutal. I FINALLY called for real. But it took many tries.

I also used to dream I got out of bed, got dressed, etc. Then I would wake up and have to do it all over again for real. Made Mondays suck doubly.

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l_Lathliss_l t1_ixy3vqx wrote

I’ve done the same on occasion. Usually I’m running late to work and as I’m walking in I wake up. I have to do the morning over again but I guess I’m on time now, so idk.

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harpejjist t1_iy1j9jj wrote

It sucks the worst when it is a bitter cold damp Monday. Who wants to do that multiple times!

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omniscientonus t1_ixzsamc wrote

When I was running heavy shifts that I wasn't used to (12+ hours) this would happen to me all the time. My wife would wake me up, I'd very groggily get dressed and then... My wife would wake me up again saying that I HAD to get up or I'd be late. I was on fact, not up or dressed, just dreamed it all.

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I-just-wanna-talk- t1_iy0txqo wrote

Stuff like this happens to me all the time when I'm sleepy. I think I already sent that mail, but only thought I did. Well tbf most of that stuff happened back when I had to get up at 6am regularly. Anything before 10am is early for me. My brain just doesn't work before 8am.

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dopeyonecanibe t1_iy49bmb wrote

I was thinking he actually called some random other number in his contacts and they were like wtf??

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StackYourPoop t1_ixwy649 wrote

Call a 5th time and apologize

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DreyaNova OP t1_ixx73um wrote

I might actually do this tomorrow morning… that would be pretty great.

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SantaMierda t1_iy0h7p0 wrote

I read that as... 'Call a 5th time and just sneeze'

lmfao

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AcrobaticSource3 t1_ixx37di wrote

You may now put “great at follow up” in the Skills section of your resume

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medicff t1_ixx7ry7 wrote

I thought this was going to be you called the wrong guy. Instead of the work line some Uber driver or ex-SO

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i_worstofall t1_ixx9tf6 wrote

OP: Hey…I’m not feeling so well..

Rep: I understand. Could you please provide your transaction number?

OP: Don’t think I’m going to make it in today…

Rep: Certainly. In order to best serve you, I will need to confirm your street address.

OP: I’ll keep you updated. Pry just that bug going around. Hoping to feel better tomorrow.

Rep: Are you calling in regard to your recent delivery from Wowza Burger and Poké?

OP: Thank you. Night night.

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MinnieShoof t1_ixwzp41 wrote

Loyal to a fault. Reminds me of those stories where the husband got put under anesthetics/black out drunk and his wife tried to do -something- and he told 'hey lady, I'm married' and she was all luvy-dovy after that.

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Rowanana t1_ixxzpi3 wrote

I once did a version of this with a very relaxed boss, luckily. Half-awake and fully delirious I sent off an email to let them know I was sick and wouldn't be coming in. A few hours later I got a phone call asking if I was OK because it's not like me to no show. Checked my history and I'd sent the email to myself.

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nctm96 t1_ixxy9fr wrote

Omg I was super sick and ended up texting my boss a super long message about how I really wanted her to believe that I was sick and she could FaceTime me if she wanted so I could prove it and how I was so sorry I was out for so long😂 and I didn’t even know I sent it until like two days later when I went to go text her again and omg the embarrassment 🤦🏻‍♀️🤦🏻‍♀️

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I-just-wanna-talk- t1_iy0ui5m wrote

I can see myself doing this lmao

Somehow I always feel a need to prove that I'm actually unable to go to work and not just faking it or being too dramatic. Especially with migraines cause they're not visible. Like, noone would be able to tell that I'm literally dying inside from the pain. It's easier with a fever cause you can prove that and noone will question it.

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harpejjist t1_ixy0iaj wrote

I have done something like this too. I kept dreaming I called, then I would wake up and realize I hadn't called. So I would try again. Rinse and repeat.

Later I asked the lady who took the call if I did in fact call. She said I did. Once. (good thing I kept trying) She said I sounded delirious. I said I had been!

Also she wasn't the person I should have called. No idea why I called her! She did pass the message along though.

We still laugh about it.

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ValkyrieSword t1_ixx6cc2 wrote

Feel better! I want a follow up on this though haha

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DreyaNova OP t1_ixx77tt wrote

I’ll guess I’ll probably give you 4 followups.

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thelonerangers69 t1_ixwtu02 wrote

It's okay man. He probably didn't answer until the last one

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onyxaj t1_ixxvbu4 wrote

I'd like an update on what your boss says when you call to apologize.

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evilpinkmonkey t1_ixxu6or wrote

I wanna know what cold medicine this is for when I inevitably get this stupid flu that is going around my work, lol.

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thorkun t1_ixyig6u wrote

> so I figured I should just pound cold medicine and coconut water and get some sleep to try and get in to work today

Eh wtf, why would you try to go into work if you're feeling like that??

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cptInsane0 t1_ixz4jvf wrote

Oh mono is rough. I got it in high school and it was basically like sleepwalking/paralysis. Most of the solution after medicine was lots of sleeping, so that part was nice.

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C-romero80 t1_ixz1uwq wrote

I once called out twice because I couldn't remember having called out. I was loopy on cough syrup and sounding drunk told my boss "I just need one more day" thankfully they knew I was sick and we all laughed about it. Hope you're already feeling better

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pollywannaquacker t1_ixzpje0 wrote

Wicked stoned

Please tell me you’re a fellow new englander 😀

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jstaprsn0130 t1_ixzskqn wrote

Epsom salt baths were a LIFESAVER when I had mono. Hope you feel better soon!!

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WeNeedToTalkAboutMe t1_iya41ob wrote

I was so sick one time I dreamed I called in to work, but when I went in for my next shift (this was the day before my days off) found out I had not, in fact, called in.

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Bagafeet t1_ixyygxr wrote

Do another COVID test in 3-4 days.

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DapperConflict1129 t1_iy2hnpl wrote

So I made own opinion on what I read , some people want to self diagnose themselves and place on social media for reasons unknown to me but do not like my opinions. Go to a mirror look in the mirror hold your fist in the mirror and raise your middle finger

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DapperConflict1129 t1_ixynd9p wrote

Cv19 or drama queen ,go to doctor and get checked out instead on reddit for pity poor me shit

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twcsata t1_ixyuvvn wrote

Dude, if you don’t want people telling their stories, why the fuck are you even on this sub? Not everything is for pity.

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DapperConflict1129 t1_iy0vst4 wrote

Why come here your personal health is important if your sick seek medical attention simple

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twcsata t1_iy1k3vb wrote

You know it’s possible to go to the doctor and post on Reddit, right? Neither one of those activities consumes every minute of the day. And besides, OP’s update would seem to indicate they did get medical attention.

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