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SHybrid t1_iwg7sy7 wrote

Well first of all your mum is a hypocrite, but this you already know. That's a bluff you can call. Having been in a similar situation back when I was living with my parents, I suggest this approach.

  1. try to tone it down instead of going nuclear. Be the mature one.
  2. play the "would you rather I had casual sex?" card. Worked for me. If I can satisfy my urges with a toy rather than a random guy from the club it's definitely better, she can't not agree. This works also for when the birth control talk comes around.
  3. buy another vibrator and hide it better. Also the shower jet is a great alternative, and they can't take that lmao
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troubled_stranger OP t1_iwgpd7y wrote

Not gonna lie, ive played both of those first two. With 1, i get way too worked up even a first few words in since she starts yelling and berating me so it doesnt work for long. With 2, i said it and the first time she ignored me and second she just repeated that im too young for these things.

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ajm900 t1_iwgu2kq wrote

She shouts because wrong, she is probably used to getting her way by shouting others into submission, because even if she's wrong if she's the most aggressive and you comply she feels like she's won

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SHybrid t1_iwhadmh wrote

Then your solution is probably to power through, hide better your future toys and find alternative solutions (e.g. the shower nozzle). You won't be there forever.

Also when you decide to go for the real thing, don't let the fear of your mother meddling stop you from buying condoms, birth control etc. Absolutely.

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Shadoxal t1_iwhztnq wrote

On that note be very careful with water pressure. I split my clit with the water pressure as a teen and it didn't heal back together, and now I'm incredibly sensitive from it. The glands come out. I wish I had known that was possible.

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whats-reddit17 t1_iwuj2wn wrote

Wtf. I'm curious how that goes over with your Dr. Also did you notice right away. (Mid session pain) or what? You dont have to answer but I am curious as I didn't know this was a thing either

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Shadoxal t1_iwuxdnp wrote

It was mid session for sure, and I felt it as soon as it happened. It felt like I sliced my clit off it hurt so bad.

I've honestly never mentioned it to my Dr. I do mention it to partners because if they suck on my clit too hard it can hurt. I forgot to mention it to someone I was hooking up with and the gland popped out and he stopped and looked up at me terrified but I was fine so he like slowly went back to it 🤣🤣

I've learned recently that apparently some women do this on purpose as a body mod 🤯.

I don't mind answering cause it should definitely be talked about. I've looked into it now that I'm older and I've found threads on other websites of girls going through the same thing and nobody ever knew it was a possibility, and are scared after the fact. I know I was. I never brought it up to my mother either.

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Far-Crazy66 t1_ix61h28 wrote

Okay that is INCREDIBLY rare tho, I feel like you’re trying to scare OP with your horror story, plenty of people use a shower head and do not have split clits glands shooting out of them..

PS what area do I have to move to in order to get your elite level of water pressure??

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Shadoxal t1_ix62l6p wrote

Not trying to scare anyone... It's just good to know what's possible? If you go too hard with the pressure, it can harm you. If I had known that I would have been more careful. Never said don't do it, I said be careful. Idk why the negativity about that 🙄. And you can get higher pressure by covering part of the showerhead.

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Steve_Austin_OSI t1_iwh6ao3 wrote

Just becasue someone is a hypocrite doesn't make them wrong.
Especially when we are talking about something someone did as a teen that that can reflect upon a decade later.

WHen I was 16, I stole a police car. It was running, the cop was nowhere to be seen, so I got in and drove off.
I was in the car for about 2 minutes before a freaked out, parked it and ran away.I would advice my children to not steal police cars.

Am I a hypocrite? yes.Am I wrong? no.

I've done a ton of things as a teen I would advise other teens not to do.

​

"That's a bluff you can call."

Do you think my kids could use my hypocrisy to some who get me to tell them it's ok to steal a police car?In fact, I'm concerned you don't know what the word "bluff" means.

​

" she can't not agree. "

She can not agree, and she can insist the daughter is tracked 24/7.

" buy another vibrator "

Don't antagonize the situation, do not do that.

​

" shower jet "
Yes, use something like that.

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SHybrid t1_iwh9ufp wrote

I have no words but lol. Are you even a parent? If yes I hope these are just some extreme examples to get a kick out of talking back to a random stranger, and not real parenting tips.

If I'm to go in detail...

Your police car theft example doesn't stand. Here's why. You were doing something illegal. OP is not, nor was OP's mom when she had a vibrator. On top of that, the ethical positions on using a sex Toy can be variable, while car theft Is inherently wrong. I can possibly imagine (with not little effort) that there may be some sort of reasons for a person to regret having used a vibrator, that doesn't justify OP's mother reaction and her way of ignoring the detail that she had a vibrator too, when called out. If She thinks she had good reasons to regret a completely legal and legitimate thing, she should rationally explain why she wouldn't suggest it to her daughter instead of going berserk.

'OP's mum can argue that she's watched 24/7'

How is that healthy?! Like... Wow. Amazing parenting there. Talk about not antagonizing the situation.

Which brings me to 'don't buy another vibrator'

If the things are so bad that OP can't get back her previous one, then she should definitely buy another. It's healthier than not have one and satisfy your needs elsewhere. And not all women can get off only by-hand or (alas) with the shower.

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