So this just happened, and I honestly have no idea what to do, except to post my misfortune on reddit.

I normally get to my kids' elementary school to pick her up an hour or so early. If you think I'm crazy, the line when I leave is about 3 blocks long. I'd rather show up early, get some work done, play on my switch, and relax in my car.

Today, I decided to be a little more proactive than usual and clean my car while waiting. Particularly, my steering wheel needed attention. It had that stuff on it that's a mixture of the plastic wearing off and dirt from hands, and honestly, it looked gross.

So I get the Armorall wipes and go to town on this steering wheel. It is no easy task to take this stuff off, so I am really working the steering wheel with these wipes. When school starts to get out and the teachers come out to let kids into the cars, I am now fully into my task. I have completed the top part of the wheel and working on the bottom.

I'm sweating, grunting, and my head is down in full focus. I think you can imagine what motions I am making, and I'm sure the car was rocking back and forth as well. I lock eyes with a teacher and see that she is mildly horrified. As it downs on me what this looks like, I try to justify my actions by holding up one of the wipes... which just looks like I cleaned up with a kleenex.

Thank God I know the teacher and it was easily explained but hot damn if I am not extremely embarrassed.

TL;DR I was cleaning my steering wheel infront of an elementary school and it looked like I was jacking off. Even showed a teacher a used kleenex.

Comments

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Tech-Mechanic t1_ivv97kt wrote on November 10, 2022 at 9:25 PM

#495,985

This sounds like something you saw in a sitcom...

Shibby523 t1_ivv9so7 wrote on November 10, 2022 at 9:29 PM

#496,009

Replying to Tech-Mechanic (#495,985)

I tell you Jerry, she thought I was cranking the meat. I can never go back into that school line. Can't go back I tell you, ruined. I'm done for.

[deleted] t1_ivv9x7f wrote on November 10, 2022 at 9:30 PM

#496,016

[removed]

BentasticMrBen t1_ivvagxy wrote on November 10, 2022 at 9:34 PM

#496,036

Is this a Curb Your Enthusiasm episode? Did you get Larry David-ed?

lemmiewinxs t1_ivvb1vj wrote on November 10, 2022 at 9:38 PM

#496,071

Replying to Shibby523 (#496,009)

What's the deal with jerking off in your car? (Sitcom music plays)

lemmiewinxs t1_ivvb4e2 wrote on November 10, 2022 at 9:38 PM

#496,073

gif

Eraevn t1_ivvfxqe wrote on November 10, 2022 at 10:11 PM

#496,306

Reminds me of when my buddy and his wife were at the hospital having a baby and they asked me to take their daughter to cross country practice. No big deal, dropped her off, hit up the local Walmart for breakfast and went back to wait, not thinking that this practice was at a local park until I got the dirtiest look from a lady walking past my car with her small child right when I cracked open a Monster. Thats when I realized I was an unshaven (murder hobo is the best description) man alone at a park cracking open a cold one with a bunch of little kids and high schoolers running around. Not exactly a good look, and ended up messaging a coworker going if I go radio silent the cops are probably talking to me lol

AcrobaticSource3 t1_ivw5cmt wrote on November 11, 2022 at 1:23 AM

#497,675

You shouldn’t be trying to pick up kids, who are you, Matt Gaetz?