Damn. I wish you well. Stay in therapy.

But these people are fucked up and not your friends.

I would advise to be more strict and not ignore the red flags but address them as soon as you encounter them in order to not let them pile up and let people take more advantage of you in the future.

The male friends and you not allowed to have female friends was already a 'nope'. But it's hard to see clearly when feelings are in play.