You’re not alone, OP. I’ve definitely said some shit that I regret. What you said definitely hurt your friend, and they may need some time to figure out their feelings, so give them some time and then try reaching out again. Stress that you understand that what you said was completely wrong, and that you want to be able to make amends. I don’t know how your family is, but I do know that this relationship is not all lost, it’s just hit a bit of a bump in the road. It can be saved. Your friend just needs some time.