TIFU by eating with my bitch ass bird

Submitted by Y0ur-Auth0r t3_xwvgvx in tifu

So I (14m) have a parakeet. She's really fucking dumb but I love her. Anyways tonight I was eating ramen while she hung out on my lap, just chirping away. Now note that this ramen was made with a shit ton of eggs and soy sauce (thanks mom, didn't want that in it but love you so I'm eating it), so definitely not the healthiest to be eating. Anyways, my sweet sweet bird decided to start chirping. Usually I play along and whistle back, acting like we're causally having a conversation. Tonight was no different, except for the fact that my mouth is full of egg filled juice

It. Went. Everywhere.

Worse thing is that I did it FOUR MORE FUCKING TIMES BEFORE I STOPPED BECAUSE I HAVE THE TISM AND IM VERY FUCKING STUPID

And then the little bitch steals a huge mouthful of egg and runs off

Frantically researching whether she's gonna die from all that salt or not. Any information is GREATLY appreciated. Thanks for listening to my rant reddit

TLDR: salt filled egg flew out my mouth, bitchass bird stole it and might die. Send help

Edit: she ended up fine! Although, when I had her out today, she had a bald spot on her wings near the ends(it was very small though) so now I'm gonna have to buy anti feather plucking food and a bunch more toys to keep her off her feathers if it grows, she's a rescue so it might either because she's molting or she's having a relapse, we'll get through it though! Will be posting photos of the little floof soon

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Ill-Cardiologist-882 t1_irar99y wrote

I don't know why but I read the title like you have eaten ass and I was so confused when you mentioned a bird.. I need to leave this sub for a while.

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southernshy t1_irbhwxq wrote

I read the title as he ate his bird. Kept waiting how you could accidentally eat a live bird

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Useful_Experience423 t1_irbgbtv wrote

Ummm, hate to say it, but you did something stupid, then repeated it 4 more times and the bird is the dumb one? She literally played you like a tune for extra food!

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Y0ur-Auth0r OP t1_irbhff8 wrote

She took a bite, flinched in pure disgust, and then another bite, flinch, and then she ran off with it and ate it before I could get it away. Went straight for the water dish when I put her back in the cage. Birds are wild lol

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Useful_Experience423 t1_irbiftc wrote

Lol, I bet she thought:

Daaamn; this is what he’s been eating? He seems to really like it though, so I’ll try again. Nope! Can’t let him have it back though. It’ll set a precedent and it’s finders keepers round here!

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jacksonsjob t1_irba6sk wrote

Your little bird should be okay. Just don’t make a habit out of it. Provide plenty of fresh water. Many birds will eat off salt blocks for the benefits and you can give chickens/poultry the equivalent of very salty Gatorade in the summer and after an illness to help them stay hydrated. On the plus side, the bit of egg has a ton of nutrition that is excellent for birds.

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SanctumXS t1_irasb1b wrote

Egg is prolly fine but salt is most likely gonna be a problem. Think of it as humans, salt is bad for humans if too much is eaten so an animal that is way smaller isn’t going to be very good

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Wraithraiser-Dude t1_ircnxrx wrote

I thought you ate the bird by the title haha. Hope the bird lives tho

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Y0ur-Auth0r OP t1_irco1th wrote

She ended up being just fine! Still a scary moment for me lol

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