As a fellow BPD patient, you can’t use BPD as an excuse to “say things you don’t mean” even if you warn people. By definition, we ARE manipulative, even subconsciously. If you make yourself or anyone else think that you’re just saying things because of an episode, you’ll use that as an advantage later. Maybe not on purpose, but I’ve done it myself. All you can do is apologize and say you’re not in a good spot mentally at the moment, and respect their decision, which you’ve said you’ll do. That means, not trying to justify the reason you did it, and not arguing against their feelings if and when they do respond. You’ll have to teach yourself to react differently and recognize symptoms. I was single for YEARS because I knew I had work to do, and now, through therapy with a counselor AND personal work, I can be a great partner and friend and family member. I recommend buying some DBT materials and BPD books while waiting for therapy, and doing a lot of internal work. Don’t try to do work based off things you read online! Online can be a terrible place to read anything about BPD, unless you know exactly what you’re looking for through a reputable source.

Best of luck to you, I hope things do work out in your best interest. If things don’t work out with this partner, perhaps take some time alone to work on yourself.