[deleted] OP t1_jdcyvpd wrote
Reply to comment by elianrae in TIFU By snooping through my wife's phone by [deleted]
if my partner wants to use it, fine by me.
i'll buy a new one for me.
elianrae t1_jdd0gz3 wrote
yeah that's a fair and conflict free way to enforce that boundary but you're still ending up with personal stuff hey
like sharing everything sounds nice and romantic in theory but there are a lot of potential negatives to getting really deeply enmeshed
Sharing all of your interests and doing everything together leaves people lost and deeply lonely if their partner dies before them. Fully sharing finances (like no longer having individual bank accounts) leaves you more vulnerable to financial abuse. Snooping through your partners phone might just end up ruining your surprise birthday party.
healthy relationships are formed when two people with independent lives make space for something shared and build it together, not from subsuming themselves into the relationship until nothing individual is left.
anyway that's what I meant by my much shorter and somewhat ruder comment 😁
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