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Mau36 t1_j9awr1g wrote

Eh yes. Cheating by texting another time after already been caught is a fuck up and I would probably break up after the first cheating, but certainly now.

I do wonder why asking your gf to send this kind of messages wasn't an option? You can send horny messages without cheating.

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[deleted] OP t1_j9awwuh wrote

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Mau36 t1_j9axowu wrote

Shitty that it led to this fuck up then.
But you were in a relationship together. So while I get the embarrasment, sending dirty messages to your partner or talking about that isn't weird. Communication does help.

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[deleted] OP t1_j9ay6ca wrote

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Unsure_if_Relevant t1_j9ayx5f wrote

If she accepted you as no one had, I am certain she would have welcomed the dirty texts.

No more excuses, own your mistake and actually learn from it this time

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[deleted] OP t1_j9az76r wrote

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Unsure_if_Relevant t1_j9azhpw wrote

Noooo, my point is in the future share that part of yourself with your partner.

And I totally get the feeling like you will be alone forever, but hopefully time will pass and you will have more chances. It will be up to you to take one of those chances

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[deleted] OP t1_j9azrxl wrote

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AcrobaticSource3 t1_j9axgoo wrote

> don’t be an idiot like me

Presumably you mean “don’t chat with prostitutes,” not “don’t forget to clear your chat history after you chatted with prostitutes”

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[deleted] OP t1_j9axp6h wrote

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ShowMEurBEAGLE t1_j9c6age wrote

Bruh you got a problem. You shouldn't need to do this in a relationship. Perhaps she isn't the girl for you or you need to be in an open relationship. Or consider being treated for sex addiction if it's something you physically cannot control. Instead of beating yourself up for being an idiot, try to understand the underlying reason for why you did what you did. You'll just repeat the same mistakes again if you don't.

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Reddit-username_here t1_j9b21wt wrote

Yep, cheating usually will fuck up relationships. Good for her for finding out before you wasted more of her life and actually getting out.

Sounds to me like you need some therapy if you can't control yourself.

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[deleted] OP t1_j9b28vs wrote

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Reddit-username_here t1_j9b33es wrote

Stop trying to downplay it by calling it chatting. You cheated on her. There's a big difference between watching some random porn and actually communicating with another person for sexual gratification.

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chronuss007 t1_j9b7lkr wrote

Im wondering what the exact things are that make something considered cheating.

To me, having a sexual chat with someone is much less worse than having sex with them directly. Many people would let that go in my opinion as long as the other person was willing to talk about what they're missing in the relationship. I would see porn as someone looking at another person in thoughts of having sex with them which I would think would align more with cheating potentially.

This guy messed up twice, so it's a little bit more understandable why she would leave though.

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Reddit-username_here t1_j9b8lud wrote

The definition could be different for every relationship, but most people would consider making a personal connection with someone else, especially for sexual reasons, to be cheating.

With porn, you're not actually making any kind of connection with them, so most people don't care about that. Some do, but for the most part it's not an issue.

Now, if you were subscribing to someone's Only fans or something like that, talking to them, requesting things, then most people are probably going to find an issue with that as well.

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[deleted] OP t1_j9b3ekx wrote

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Fontec t1_j9b3dna wrote

“I’m horny and don’t feel comfortable sexting you and am going to a professional, how do you feel about that?”

and then y’all interact with each others boundaries

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Devi1_May_Cry t1_j9b70m3 wrote

Don't waste the time of prostitutes. If you're interested, just book his/her time.

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distant-starlight t1_j9byu68 wrote

Weird how actively repeatedly cheating on your SO causes them to leave you. Who would have thought 🤔

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Moist_Board t1_j9bx8jp wrote

Man that's some Don Jon level shit

Ps ask her if she's mad because she thinks she's not woman enough for you

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Thialase t1_j9c5amp wrote

you got what you deserved

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