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trashcrayon t1_jaa79il wrote

This played out in my head like a movie as I read it and from the cackles I made, I have achieved Annoying Wife status

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RudeSprinkles1240 t1_jaajn39 wrote

When I catch a cold, I get bronchitis, every single time. I cough so much I can't sleep, and all the muscles in my belly feel sore and sprung. I try not to cough because it hurts so much, but the tickle in my throat makes me gag instead.

This lasts for weeks.

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mostlygray t1_jab4t4l wrote

When I was in high school, I had a cough that hurt so bad that every time I coughed or sneezed I literally screamed in agony. So I started holding in the cough like a fool.

After a day of this I was having trouble breathing so I finally let myself cough. It was the most disgusting loud gurgling bark. I horked up an entire mouthful of phlegm and blood. Scabrous and green.

Suddenly, after the agony died down, I felt so much better. I probably should have gone to the hospital because I definitely had pneumonia but I figured, if it was coming out, there wasn't much they could do for a viral lung infection. It worked.

I was back at school the next day with a trash can sitting next to me to spit my green lung butter out. One teacher complained but the class had my back and told her to leave me alone so she did.

Apparently I grew up in a different time, I don't think I'd get away with that now.

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Setthegodofchaos t1_jacow01 wrote

I laughed so hard at this I choked and now have a cough of my own!

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