> I broke up with a very attractive woman (girl 1) so I could be with a different less attractive woman.

You need to be single for a while. Watch a little less porn and just focus on yourself. Figure out how to mature, how to value a woman for who she is, not how she looks. (Yes, being attracted to someone is important in a relationship. But, you seem fixated on this.) If you contact Girl 1, she'll be mad at you. If she isn't mad and you date her, you'll be immature and break her heart. If you go find a different gf, you'll break her heart too.

You need to become less of an AH inside. You're likely confused on what "feelings" are. We can develop unhealthy, unrealistic, and problematic "attachments" that aren't the same as feelings. We can miss someone physically and sexually but it not be any deeper. Until you've come to learn what these are... you'll cause a lot of problems. People get love mixed up a lot.

And at the end of the day, the way most people learn is by being shitty for a while and then maturing. But the goal is to be as least shitty as you can be. And you wanna know the hardest truth I ever learned?

Once you screw it up, it's nearly impossible to screw it down. You can't put the toothpaste back in the bottle. So learn young and be kind.