NovaHorizon t1_j9xtf7g wrote on February 25, 2023 at 9:45 AM

Probably not the right sub to post this in, but here are my thoughts.

You are both very young and lack life experience. I'm sure your boyfriend is trying his best to not hurt your feelings and support you when it comes to your past trauma, but as an 18 year old he doesn't nearly have enough experience to replace a professional therapist.

So here is the best tip I can give. Try to find a cognitive behavioral therapist to work on your trauma. It will make things so much easier for you!

Let your boyfriend be part of it and don't completely shut him out. Communication is key.

I'm sure with time you'll understand that those scars aren't reminders of your past trauma, but marks of honor that are proof of your strength and will of survival.

Lurcher99 t1_j9y4tq6 wrote on February 25, 2023 at 12:22 PM

>I'm sure with time you'll understand that those scars aren't reminders of your past trauma, but marks of honor that are proof of your strength and will of survival.

so this...worth repeating to yourself every day

Throwawaymybrain18 OP t1_j9z3qby wrote on February 25, 2023 at 5:03 PM

Thank you! I have already told him before that I'm looking into therapy and that if he wants to be apart of it he can be too because while working on my past I want to ensure a better future for us.

notmyname2012 t1_j9zs2cl wrote on February 25, 2023 at 7:43 PM

First I’m sorry for your past trauma. I second looking into not just regular therapy but something like Cognitive Behavioral Therapy or one that a friend of mine with a lot of similar trauma as you has done called Accelerated Resolution Therapy. These teach you how to cope and move past trauma and how to deal with the triggers in your life. Secondly, I’m a older guy and the woman I love has scars, I don’t see the scars as ugly, they are just part of her and I find her beautiful as could be. The scars tell a story and that’s ok. She is still here and alive and those stories written in the scars show the resilience and beauty in overcoming. One day you won’t be ashamed of your scars, so hang in there.