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letmeseesubreddits t1_j7zl6hl wrote

Reply to comment by AllanfromWales1 in TIFU by spending the night at my boyfriend’s by [deleted]

planning to go no contact as soon as i’m 18, but i guess that never stops them. they did the same thing to my mom almost every day when she was in her mid-20’s living two hours away.

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AllanfromWales1 t1_j7zp9i4 wrote

Report them to the police so that there's something on record to say the police should not take too much notice when they call.

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letmeseesubreddits t1_j7zpl54 wrote

i will be doing that when i’m 18, but since they have used my mom’s mental health as a crutch to continue doing it to her for her entire life i will probably also be taking some more preventative measures as well

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AllanfromWales1 t1_j7zqczg wrote

> more preventative measures

Nothing involving baseball bats I hope..

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Depressaccount t1_j80cy2j wrote

I would say that usually these people do escalate until they get a response from you. The trick is to grit and bear all of that until they stop. They have to truly believe that they will not get a response from you no matter what they do.

One option might be changing your name?

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letmeseesubreddits t1_j80d60n wrote

i’ve actually been planning on changing my name for a long time because i don’t like the past being tied to it. it’ll definitely be freeing to do. gritting and bearing has been my tactic for a long time but as i get older i get more explosive towards them and when i walked in the house this morning, not a word has been spoken since.

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Depressaccount t1_j80ew84 wrote

Yeah, one of the things you could really say to them that they’d actually care about (because clearly they don’t care about your feelings) is, “you really embarrassed yourselves today.” And don’t even bother to elaborate.

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Berlinia t1_j803n75 wrote

The moment you turn 18 get a restraining order. If they continue, sue them for all they got.

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letmeseesubreddits t1_j8047rm wrote

unfortunately, most of what they’ve got right now is my rent money, my child support, and their retirement fund. but hey, it’s something at least. i would definitely feel guilty for suing them if something did happen that would breach the terms of a restraining order but i do know it would be necessary.

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leatherpens t1_j80o5w3 wrote

Wait I'm sorry, did you say they're charging you rent? Your mother, sure, they can make her pay rent, but I'm pretty sure you can't charge a minor rent

edit: turns out it depends on the state, if you have the means to contribute they can charge rent... Though not all states.

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letmeseesubreddits t1_j80odl8 wrote

it’s an unofficial agreement but they were getting mad at me for taking so much space with my stuff as well as part of their electricity bill. i like to think of it as me paying for my mother in a way if that makes sense. it gives me some semblance of comfort

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