You need help. There is no such thing as ‘showing your affection’ through non consensual touch. You’re not showing your affection because it has no regard for the people you’re doing it to. If you were showing that you care, you’d take into consideration how the other person actually feels. Therapy is a good place to start.

Appreciate the honesty. I did go to a therapist before, but not anymore ever since I moved away

The main issue I can see is drinking that much to begin with. It caused you to blackout and behave in a way that you wouldn't normally if sober. You said your friend got you hammered but I assume he didn't force it down your throat.

See this as a learning experience and try to move forward from here, OP. It sounds like you are trying to make apologies and amends for your behaviour. The next thing is to make sure you never behave like that again.

Also being touch feely with strangers, regardless of the intent, is not really a good idea. It's a violation of someone's boundaries, even if you didn't mean it in that way.

Definitely had way too much alcohol and its completely my fault for sure. One of the girls even replied and accepted my apology and gave me forgiveness.

But she did say that I need time to understand the situation and then maybe our paths can cross again (we were on good terms and friendly)

Its never a stranger that I get touchy with. Always the people closer to me. But yes for sure, I need to work hard on that.

Try not drinking. If you want any sort of redemption; stay sober and don't give yourself a chance to become that touchy guy. You might sit out a few parties and some people probably won't want to talk to you for a while. Better to focus on being healthy and finding other ways to have fun.

Just out of curiosity, what is your first language?

Vietnamese

What did you do for girls to leave the party? Most people don’t just go molesting women when they’re drunk OP you need help.

They didnt actually leave the party though. I mentioned what happened in the post. Nothing happened which would classify it as rape or molesting happened (according to the girls). But yeah it was a tough night and a real wake up call that i am taking. I am more of a social drinker and not an alcoholic, but as someone else mentioned, I will try being sober. I havent done anything of this sort in the past (sober or drunk) but would prefer to completely eliminate the possibility.

From your post

“They got uncomfortable to the point that a few had to leave because they didnt want to be around me.”

Sorry, english wasnt my first language. I meant to say that they felt that they wanted to leave. I see the confusion

Stay sober, don't drink that much again. I'm not going to judge you since everyone messes up in life, especially being young, I've also made bad mistakes in my past.

Just think about what you did or might have done, and think about what kind of person you are because of doing so, do it without trying to cover it or make it less bad.

Think about what kind of person you are when you do that, when you are drunk and start doing those wretched things. Now, do you want to be that person? You are now, but you don't have to continue being that person. You can change, by not committing the same mistakes and being better. Getting drunk and acting like that only brings shame and bad feelings, it's not worth it.

Life is like a chess game, you can't undo moves, but you have to try and do the best you can with what you have right now.

Don't let people here on Reddit make you feel bad.

But change, be better, stop drinking, get your shit together.

I really appreciate that! Its been a tough couple of weeks but i am trying to be better. I feel nothing will be the same again but thats fine. Staying sober is the goal, atleast around the friends.