>but the overarching problem will always be discomfort and sexualization of male intimacy in our culture.

My perspective is that of a gay woman who in past shows would, for my own entertainment, decide I'm gonna pretend these two characters are together (biggest example that comes to mind is ADA Cabot and detective Olivia Benson in SVU).

One of the reasons I would read into interactions what is or isn't there is because back in the day there were not a lot of options to see a genuine lesbian relationship on my TV. The level of closeness and intimacy that you see all the time portrayed between a man+woman wasn't something queer audiences got to experience often if at all. So when you'd find a show that portrays a relationship that seems deeper than a typical friendship portrayal, you get a bit excited. And you assign this additional context to the scene.

So I would say it's not just a discomfort but sometimes a response to something you don't get a lot of but would like to. So when you see hints of it, you latch on. And often what you're reading into the scenes is not what's happening. But then sometimes it feels like it's exactly what they want you to think even if it's not what's happening. Hence the queer baiting label.