Sits spouse and kids down at the dinner table: “Honey, kids, I have some bad news. We’re going to have to tighten our belts a little, as I’m only going to bring in 2.5 million this year.”

I’m sure the kids are scared, and the possibility of divorce is heightened due to the financial troubles looming in the household. I hope they live in an area with free school lunches and generous social safety nets.