> Like I feel like these things are tied to an overall worldview and are key components of a personality and those are things that fuel meaningful relationships for me.

I was going to make a quip about "yes, I am married" but then I got to this line. Just cause someone likes modern country music doesn't mean they are a bad person, it just means we have different rules about open air music playing or what happens in the car. When I did lots of stuff involving live music, I just went by myself cause they didn't have any interest in being in crowds or who was performing or anything like that.

The biggest things for a meaningful relationship for me is a significant overlap in core values regarding forward planning, kindness (not niceness, there is a difference), personal drive, conceptual thinking (or even more broadly but less of a metric, overall intelligence). A more distant fifth/sixth place would be broad political alignment, and value of children. A lot of that can be wrapped up in the idea of worldview, but I suspect you and I differ on what makes up that concept. It's really tough for me to invest a chunk of my (already stretched) emotional energy on someone if they deviate in multiple categories, especially that first set.

My spouse and I don't really share hobby interests (I have hobbies in music and gaming and painting, they in cycling, home crafts, cooking), we have very different Myers Brigs profiles (we share a T) and mine is strident at that... We're quite different people, but we share some foundational values; such as (but not limited to) we both share political views (even down to that 8 categories break out that Pew does), we are both driven, we're both kind (the whole east coast "baby needs a hat" theory resonates with us), but "nice" isn't usually an adjective attributed to us (especially me). I think it was Esther Perel who talked about "we are looking for someone who checks boxes for various needs we have at romantic/intellectual/social/etc levels" and my spouse checks more proverbial boxes (and the more important ones at that) than any other person I know. They don't check all of the boxes, but nobody does. We've been together for a long time.