[deleted] OP t1_j6he55w wrote
Reply to comment by No_Spot_1291 in I (23m) downloaded a dating app after a year of dating 4 months ago and my (23f) girlfriend broke up with me today by [deleted]
I agree and will most likely be how this ends up. i just feel like its almost more disrespectful to say i will be more faithful in future relationships when shes the one who deserves it
No_Spot_1291 t1_j6hf3jd wrote
Well, man, words are easy. Saying she's the love of your life (do you know how many times do we read that on posts about people who've cheated on their partners?) and how she deserves lotalty means nothing when your actions showed her otherwise. That was the disrespectful part, how you'll behave in future relationships won't affect her.
[deleted] OP t1_j6hf9ln wrote
How many of those people that physically fucked someone besides there significant other have gotten back together tough. My actions are not justifiable at all nor am i trying to say i deserve to get her back but i rather try to prove i can be better then just let her walk out of my life without a word
No_Spot_1291 t1_j6hfmde wrote
Many have, but that's beside the point.
If you want to be better, do so, but not for her, she's already made a decision; do it because cheating on your partner is shitty. She doesn't have to stick around waiting for you to prove that you can respect her - she can be single or find another man who will, someone who won't break her trust and then try to prove himself.
icanschwim t1_j6hfluj wrote
The fact of the matter is you don't necesserily "deserve" it. You aren't automatically entitled to "try" it and I don't think you understand that.
[deleted] OP t1_j6hfps8 wrote
To not try would just prove i never did care would it not?
icanschwim t1_j6hg3gn wrote
No it doesn't. You've had months after to try and for whatever reason it seems its not enough.
You should have been trying from moment she agreed to get back together. Not from now, because she broke up with you.
[deleted] OP t1_j6hghsc wrote
I wasn’t actively going out of my way to prove i was being faithful, not that i feel it wouldve made a difference. i was not aware it was something that was causing her this much grief until she got to her breaking point. Like i said we had talked about it when it happened and got back together, i had assumed she wouldve broken up with me then if it wasn’t something we could come back from
icanschwim t1_j6hjk3o wrote
Well you evidently want to "try" whatever that means so just be honest with it. However I don't think you realise that you taking accountability and being faithful isn't enough for a relationship.
It's her choice in the end.
[deleted] OP t1_j6hjvy5 wrote
which is why i came here in the first place, obviously i do not want to breakup but im not going to manipulate or try to convince her to stay with me. if its possible to prove to her im capable of earning her trust back then i will do whatever she asks if not then i take the mistakes on my chin. I made the decision i made, there is no undoing it and if it ends up being a painful lesson that’s something i will have to carry with me the rest of my life
icanschwim t1_j6hmi5n wrote
>painful lesson that’s something i will have to carry with me the rest of my life
I disagree with this. You've acknowledged it. Now it's time to learn from it. You take it forward by your actions not by holding onto it. A lesson for this relationship (if she wants to continue) but also for the relationships going forward. No good can come from holding onto something like this for the rest of your life.
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