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frockofseagulls t1_j2fapne wrote

Block Diane. Find a therapist and go by yourself. After a few months, ask your wife to go to couples counseling together.

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cheesmanglamourghoul t1_j2faso9 wrote

Do not contact Diane. you need to get into couples therapy immediately so you can discuss this with your wife. Your brain is just seeking out the only alternative that I can find to help you cope with the experiences you’re dealing with at the moment. But whatever you do, do not contact Diane she has nothing to do with the situation and it’s totally unfair to try and bring her into it. it seems like your wife has gone through a lot of trauma and she would also benefit from seeing either her own therapist or a group therapy for people who have dealt with parental loss, esp cancer. Don’t throw away an entire life and family on a whim. That being said as someone whose parents stay together for the kids for 25 years, don’t let that be your only reason to stay either. Therapy is the answer.

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JstVisitingThsPlanet t1_j2fbm71 wrote

You both need individual and couples counseling. If she won’t go, you go on your own and work on yourself. It’s pretty fucked up you’ve been thinking about another person for so much of your relationship. The way you feel about Diane is most likely just a fantasy because you don’t feel happy. Rather than focusing on the real issues and working in improving them, you have developed a fantasy about Diane and think your life would be better with her and in all honesty you’d probably still not be happy.

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