(28M) (25F) does she miss me or just the security?

Submitted by Sitdown_comedian95 t3_zzu0a1 in relationship_advice

I broke up with my gf recently. Although I was the dumper, I feel like the dumpee, she had checked out of the relationship sometime ago, pretty much acting single late nights talking the other guys etc so after constantly challenging her about it and fighting everyday I broke up with her and kicked her out to live with her mum.

Since the move she’s been blowing my phone up saying how much she misses me, how there nobody else for her and how she realises all her mistakes etc and all she wants is to come back and that she’s really struggling living back home.

I eventually agree to meet for a coffee, this is where I get skeptical, all she did was talk about how she misses our home, misses all her stuff she bought over the years (a lot of it is still here because she has no room for it at her mums) how she just doesn’t feel at home at her mums and feels so out of place and just wants to be back in her own home. She didn’t say a lot about missing me however, she just rambled on about how inconvenienced she is at her mums. She did mention a few times how she wants me and her to work things out eventually and believes we will one day but I’m not convinced, it really didn’t seem like she loved me in the last 6 months of our relationship. I’m thinking me breaking up with her just completely blindsided her.

My question is, could a girl be so heartless to come back to a man just for the sake of the security even if she doesn’t love him?

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stereonix t1_j2dj6a6 wrote

What? Of course there are human beings out there that are willing to be manipulative in order to have a comfortable roof over their heads. Your first mistake was agreeing to talk to her—block her and move on.

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Murky_Anxiety4884 t1_j2dkp5u wrote

It is definitely possible for a woman to be that heartless. She appears to be a good example of someone with that condition.

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Sad_Entertainer6312 t1_j2dl2ky wrote

>My question is, could a girl be so heartless to come back to a man just for the sake of the security even if she doesn’t love him?

Yes

Now that being said, perhaps she is genuinely remorseful for her mistakes. You could tell.her exactly what the issues were, and so.long as she's willing ro work in fixing them you'll.g8be her another chance, but that not going to start with her moving back in, that's 6-12 months away.

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Sitdown_comedian95 OP t1_j2drecw wrote

Her moving back in is definitely out of the question for the foreseeable, I’m not completely against giving the relationship another go however.

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MysteriousMaximum488 t1_j2dr7mt wrote

Yes, people will go back to a relationship, not for love but for security, money, stability. You don't have to let her come back. If you want to test the waters with her, try dating for awhile, 6 months or longer before moving her back in.

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