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Worldsgreatestfrog t1_j29j5kg wrote

Danger! Danger! Right now I see it as a bonus that you haven’t fully committed to this guy, because he is some combination of mamma’s boy and “not that into you”, and that’s fine if you want something casual, but you have to know that this guy is not commitment material.

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Realistic-Airport775 t1_j2a1jyi wrote

So I feel like you see someone you like and who you think may make a great partner, if only he grew up, ditched his mothers rules, didn't stay out as often in his social circle, was comfortable being an adult and sleeping with you/in your home, didn't talk to other women, hid his phone use from you, was more open to physical touch and initated it more.

So I want to ask, if there are so many things that are not working for you, then do you think perhaps that there is more things that he would need to change than most?

The best successful relationships are about finding someone that fits with you without needing to change themselves in any way, or at least close enough that you can discuss things in an adult way and come to an agreement.

This person looks nothing like the person you want to be with at all and I feel (and this is my personal opinion) that you are feeling anxious about getting your own place and he has come along and your fears are grasping onto someone to help you get throught this period of life, he isn't going to do that and has proved already that he isn't.

His family dynamic is also all wrong for you as his mother rules the household with even his older brother bringing his partner over to the house, so no independence there either.

I am sorry but I would throw this one back into the sea and let him swim away and catch one closer to your goals and values.

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Ginger_brit93 t1_j2am50c wrote

There are three people in your relationship your boyfriend you and his mother. Leave whilst you still can and find someone that has time.

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Due-Leadership-3530 t1_j2c8i7c wrote

Quite seriously I wonder if he isn't a closet homo sexual and using every thing else as an excuse. Some thing just seems off. You don't say how his mother acts toward you.

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ThrowRAbeachgirl2903 OP t1_j2f2ywr wrote

I’m not too sure about this one because I’ve had the homo sexual conversation with him and he claims he isn’t and is very ‘straight’. His had guys hit on him before though. Just to clarify: his mum and I get along. I actually am quite good with parents. She just had very strict rules that her 3 kids abide by

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