Submitted by Worldexplorer_ t3_1002qee in relationship_advice
gcitt t1_j2f4zl4 wrote
Because you put up with it for 7 years and married him anyway. Why would he change? He already has what he wants. Unfortunately, what he wants isn't to make you happy.
Worldexplorer_ OP t1_j2f56j9 wrote
He does make me happy.. in other ways. He’s kind and does the dishes. He’s super supportive. He wants kids & I don’t right now, and he makes sure I know that I don’t need to do anything I don’t want to.
gcitt t1_j2f9az4 wrote
That is bare minimum shit. That is what you get from a roommate.
Worldexplorer_ OP t1_j2fahpl wrote
What should I do?
gcitt t1_j2fhjp8 wrote
Tell him what you need. Tell him you're done if you don't see any effort. Stick to your word.
Worldexplorer_ OP t1_j2fin0w wrote
I’m not that brave :(
gcitt t1_j2fk1tw wrote
Then you're going to be miserable. There is no third option. He's not going to magically change.
Worldexplorer_ OP t1_j2fkdjq wrote
Every year i think, “this is the year” & i swear he’s perfect in every other way. But i agree with you, it’s like having a roommate. Which sucks for me. But i love him :( and i feel like he tries & fails. Like it’s very hard for him. When we talk about it he says he’ll try harder and never tries to justify it.
gcitt t1_j2fl1t2 wrote
Yeah, I did that for 5 years. Once I stopped putting up with it, I was immediately replaced. You're a seat filler.
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