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ldsgirl2022 OP t1_j2dowrs wrote

Reply to comment by BeaArt78 in (31F) (21M) Mutual Attraction? Dealing with a Major Crush On My Guy Friend by ldsgirl2022

At first I did not want to but he grew on me. Yes I tried those things but he was persistent. I do not usually connect with younger guys but his values are the same as mine because he is mature. It is ageist to say that he can't be in my life because he is younger. When he asks me to be his girlfriend is when I should tell him my preference.

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BeaArt78 t1_j2dr4kj wrote

Its not ageist lol hes barely out of his teens!! Youre over 30. Youre just trying to validate something you know is wrong

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ldsgirl2022 OP t1_j2drg2k wrote

He validated it not me. He would tell me it's just a number whenever I would try to write him off or hint that I want to friend zone him because he is younger. Him being younger makes things harder, but he enjoys that I am older. I don't think it is wrong, I just think he shouldn't be flirting with me.

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BeaArt78 t1_j2drtb1 wrote

But you're allowing him to by responding. You obviously like it or youd block him and ignore him.

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ldsgirl2022 OP t1_j2dsk4b wrote

I didn't like it before, I tried blocking him but he found a way around it and apologized for his stalker like behavior. He could not understand why I did not like his attention and said he just loves me and wants to be there for me.

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BeaArt78 t1_j2dt7ow wrote

So block again. You arent required to respond to him.

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ldsgirl2022 OP t1_j2dtv8c wrote

I blocked because he is younger and I thought he was just a horny younger guy but he showed me his is very mature and capable of loving me. I like how he makes me feel, and he likes how I respond to how he is with me. It is hard for us to ignore this. I won't be blocking him.

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BeaArt78 t1_j2dvbtk wrote

Ok then date him. I dont know what else to tell you. You seem to be looking for validation rather than advice. .

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ldsgirl2022 OP t1_j2dw7oa wrote

Asking for validation would be saying that I am considering dating him. I am not. I am acknowledging that he was acting like a boyfriend and wants to keep this dynamic going, but because I like who he is I do not know if I should go along with this because we are both marriage minded.

Are you saying I am in denial ? This whole time I was fine with believing him and are just friends and it will never go past that. You make it seem like he is ready to hump my leg if I don't cut him off.

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SerenityM3oW t1_j2e1yc8 wrote

How smart were you at 21? I bet you did a bunch of stupid things. All 21 year olds think they are as mature as 31 year olds

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ldsgirl2022 OP t1_j2e2raj wrote

This is what I think about when I realize he is different. He would have thought I was too immature if he was 21 when I was. We had completely different values and I also did not have the strong faith I do now. He is part of that, and it is something we bonded over and he helped bring out. I was not mature like him at that time and didn't want marriage minded relationships until right about this age. He acts like he's in his 30s and is structuring his life in that way. He is far from stupid, so he knows what he is doing. What makes you think he is naive and stupid in who he tells he loves and who he invests his time in? Why do you think he is unable to make decisions for himself ?

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