Submitted by myWholeWifeIsaLie t3_z7u5pr in relationship_advice
pineapplesgreen t1_iya65az wrote
Reply to comment by thechadman27 in Found out Wife cheated on me a bunch during bootcamp 10 years ago by myWholeWifeIsaLie
I never said life is about scratching all itches. In fact, I absolutely did not say that nor do I respect someone who does that on purpose. You mistook everything I said. I’m describing what is going on in the mind of people who cheat. If someone cheats on me, it won’t hurt me or make me angry, I’ll instead become unattracted because I’ll think of them as predictable and underdeveloped. They’re like experimental mice, I couldn’t be in awe of someone who has these all too human urges. Cheaters don’t even consciously know they are “scratching an itch”. They have a gaping hole that is the need for validation. Once that is resolved; that hole is filled and their purpose in life becomes something above those human urges. I’m not saying that people should actively fill that hole. That might not even be possible to fill on purpose. I’m saying that those who don’t feel an urge to cheat or seek attention have those holes filled for some reason that they can’t pinpoint but I think of it as having been through enough of everything for it to not be a life mission anymore. Maybe its a point where the person truly KNOWS their inner selves. Like a true contentedness. Then they can truly function beyond what they were and grow more as a human being.
People easily and emotionally downvote on here especially before truly understanding a person’s point but I don’t really care about that. People do come to see these things on their own once they can see the big picture outlook and compartmentalize their emotions from their reasoning skill.
Ever since I was a child, I’ve always been collected, calculated, and observant. It is a natural habit of mine to analyze the inner workings of people and what makes them do what they do. So all of whatever I’ve said is simply an analysis, not an approval of that behavior. I literally think of those people as primitive and unevolved, but I don’t think they’re bad people, thats way too black and white, only that they have some more developing and self reflection to do. But of course, anyone who thinks black and white like that can’t and straight up won’t see what I’m saying. But the benefit of seeing the world through a rational lens is that you become less pessimistic and can truly enjoy the beauty of it. You’re not bogged down by reactions and emotions.
You might even have the urge to remain in disagreement despite a possibility that you might agree. Thats a human urge and I hope you don’t fall victim to that. If not, I’d be ecstatic to have a proper discussion without resorting to defensiveness.
chupawhat t1_iyap4ck wrote
what in god’s holy name are you blathering about
pineapplesgreen t1_iyap83n wrote
Hey, if you don’t want to read it, don’t, just scroll past to something else more appealing to your eyes. No need to be rude.
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