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[deleted] OP t1_iyddjln wrote

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99probsbutadogaint1 t1_iydj8wa wrote

"Issue" #1

>My boyfriend doesn’t care that my coworker seems interested in me

This in it of itself is not a problem. It's not your bf's job to shut down your coworker. That's your job, and your bf seems to trust that either your coworker isn't "romantically" interested in you or that you'll shut him down if he does show that he's "romantically" interested in you. So honestly no problem here as far as I can see.

Issue #2

Literally everything about this reply here ^

You and your bf should be spending quality time together. Everyone is allowed and should have "alone" time to do their own thing, but if he's not giving you any of his time that's an issue.

>Now, I have a guy who actually does want to do stuff with me and takes an interest in my interests. I don’t know. I’d just think maybe my boyfriend would try to step it up if he really cared I guess.

OOF... Sounds like you're having "the grass is always greener on the other side" trope. Not really fair to be telling bf about this guy and expecting him to see that you're really asking him to spend more time with you.

>I’ve expressed to my boyfriend before that I often feel very lonely with him. He doesn’t have much to do with me and shows little interest in me. He never likes to go out and do things with me.

Not sure what "I've expressed" looks like, but I'd recommend a serious sit down convo with your bf about this. He needs to be spending more time with you, otherwise, are you still with him?

>he said yeah, because now he doesn’t have to.

If that's what your bf told you, he's either an asshole and you should seriously consider dumping him, or he's a dumbass and, assuming you want to stay with him, should educate him on what a relationship is.

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ReadEmAndWeepLOL t1_iydfjho wrote

Sounds like that's the real problem, the boyfriend just really doesn't care

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xcapades t1_iydnv4h wrote

Trying to use another guy to make your boyfriend act right is a bit childish imo, deal with your issues in your relationship directly. Break up with him if you want as he sounds trash.

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Direct_Relationship2 t1_iydnfvg wrote

So do you like this other guy or not?

Why are you even entertaining this guy if you aren’t done with your bf?

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Appropriate-Energy69 t1_iydmubn wrote

Sounds like you’re the one who’s losing love. Before doing anything further or making any decisions break up with your boyfriend first. Don’t have to cheat to see if he will react.

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bekahed979 t1_iydnwo1 wrote

It's ok to break up with your boyfriend, you sound unhappy & like you feel unappreciated.

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Aria133 t1_iydoqan wrote

I know that exact feeling. It's such a crappy feeling to feel so alone while in a relationship. I'm a gamer too and so was my ex but he thought just us being in the same room was us hanging out, even though we'd be playing different games. I'd suggest date nights but he'd complain the whole time and make me feel like crap.

I'd say have a big talk with your bf about putting more effort into the relationship and I hope he starts. It sounds like he's become comfortable and just taking advantage of the situation.

While it's nice that this guy seems interested and is trying to make an effort to impress you. Work relationships aren't always the best idea either.

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pineboxwaiting t1_iydos9h wrote

Ha! The problem is you like the new guy better than you like your bf. Whatever will you do?

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Ampanampanampan t1_iydpfy3 wrote

Your boyfriend is a massive jerk for saying that to you. If he cared about you, why would he say that or feel that way?

Consider why you’re happy to remain in that situation.

Everyone deserves to be with someone who shares their interests and actually likes spending time with them. If your boyfriend is so relieved to not have to spend time with you, maybe it’s time to go.

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