Welcome to /r/relationship_advice. Please make sure you read our rules here. We'd like to take this time to remind users that:

• We do not allow any type of am I the asshole? or situations/content involving minors

• Any sort of namecalling, insults,etc will result in the comment being removed and the user being banned. (Including but not limited to: slut, bitch, whore, for the streets, etc. It does not matter to whom you are referring.)

• No referencing hateful subreddits and/or their rhetoric. Examples include, but is not limited to: red/blue/black/purplepill, FDS, MGTOW, etc. This includes, but is not limited to, referring to people as Chads, pick-me's, or pornsick. Any infractions of this rule will result in a ban. This is not an all-inclusive list.

• All bans in this subreddit are permanent. You don't get a free pass.

• What we cannot give advice on: rants, unsolicited advice, medical conditions/advice, mental illness, letters to an ex, "body counts" or number of sexual partners, legal problems, financial problems, situations involving minors, and/or abuse (violence, sexual, emotional etc). All of these will be removed and locked. This is not an all-inclusive list.

If you have any questions, please send us a modmail.

#This is an automatic comment that appears on all posts. This comment does not necessarily mean your post violates any rules.

I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please contact the moderators of this subreddit if you have any questions or concerns.

Either she did what she said or she got the D one last time. In the end if you trust her you trust her, and if you dont you dont.

Thats where im struggling, i trust her, i dont think that anything happened. I just feel like weird about the whole thing like im bothered by the fact she went and hung out with her ex regardless of the circumstances. I dont want to be that person tho

So .... you dont trust her, stop lying to yourself mate. If you did then her meeting an ex wouldnt be a problem.

Tbh, that’s really weird and unnecessary. He wasn’t just an ex who she strictly hung out with, but someone who she was sleeping with prior to you. There’s literally no point in going out with an ex as a ‘goodbye’ lmao. As a 21f myself, I can see through her intentions. It’s probably hard for her to let him go, they probably fucked. But at the end of the day, it comes down to how much you trust her

I have pretty severe trust issues that im working on, i dont want to be that person, thats what i need advice on, how do i become more trusting and less neurotic

I think it is healthy and great that you are feeling those things because it would be strange if you were into this girl and didn't feel upset about it.

So embrace those feelings in a way that you understand these are normal feelings when you have interest in a partner. As long as she is not visiting the fella any longer you can definitely move past this. You can definitely have boundaries that you are comfortable with moving forward and it sounds like you two have already figured that out.

Say in the future she meets up with him again that would be a deal breaker in my mind because she knows you are uncomfortable with that. If she is a partner worth your time and cares for you she will not put you in those positions moving forward.

you do therapy.

Thank you, this is what i needed I know i want to be with her and i want to trust her Its just so new the trust hasnt been built yet and i have issues of my own ive been working on But i feel like im not allowed to be upset about things because i want to be with her so i feel insane, thank you

Find a therapist, get some help.

Know that your feelings are valid. It is how you move forward acknowledging those feelings and learning to trust your partner by their actions that will help you. Wish you the best!