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Sattalyte t1_iujdbvf wrote

If your parents don't share a room, its sounds like they 'broke up' long ago, but they stay together as they are partners in life if not in sex.

I'll tell you a cautionary tale OP. A teenage girl posted on this sub many months ago, having found out her father was cheating and asked what she should do. Everyone on this sub urged her to tell the mother.

A few days later, the girl posted at update, saying she'd told her mother, but it didn't go well. Her mother resented her for telling an uncomfortable truth, her father had disowned her, and she was distraught at the chaos her intervention had caused. She wrote many paragraphs about how much she regretted being the catalyst that destroyed her family, and that she wished she'd never taken the advice of the sub. And predictably, everyone on this sub downvoted her into oblivion.

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Throwaway785587 OP t1_iujdz3n wrote

Oh that sounds awful poor girl.

As for the rest they go through bad and good patches (Seems to be dependant on my mothers drinking but I’m thinking that her drinking has reasons too so ?), but they’ve had a good patch now so the cheating rlly caught me off guard ig?

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Sattalyte t1_iujf7yl wrote

What you do is up to you. I've always lived my life with the philosophy that we should stay out of other people's business. This sub vehemently disagrees with that, and will urge you to tell your mother, but I would caution otherwise. Your parents relationship is their own, and it's for them to work through their lives.

If I found one of my friends or family was cheating, I would take it to the grave with me.

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Throwaway785587 OP t1_iujfpwk wrote

I feel like she deserves to know, she’s a great person and deserves someone who wouldn’t betray her like this, but at the same time I worry that her mental health will drop even further if she does find out, but thank you for your advice, made me feel somewhat less shitty for not telling her yet

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knittedjedi t1_iuk1tan wrote

Genuine question, yes or no answer. Do you think she deserves to be able to make an informed choice about who she's in a relationship with?

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