Alternative-Wish-186 t1_iuj373f wrote on October 31, 2022 at 6:35 PM

Reply to comment by MarriedLife7 in My bf went out to a concert with his “girl best friend” and after the concert they’ll sleep in the same apartment til the morning by [deleted]

When I told him to set clear boundaries, he said that if he does that it might ruin what they have, and he doesn’t want to lose her, or choose between her and I. And he said that it’s MY problem if I am hurt because of this .. so I don’t really know how to tell him again that their friendship should have limits. Do you think maybe I should initiate this conversation again and how ? Thing is everything else about him is so great.. there’s only this thing that hurts our relationship

MarriedLife7 t1_iuj5a5x wrote on October 31, 2022 at 6:48 PM

I don't get how not sleeping over at her place and such is a problem. If she gets a boyfriend then her situation is likely to be the same and she will probably just put boundaries up. This will likely really hurt him in the future.

I think the thing is that you make it clear you don't want him to lose her as a friend but you don't see why he has to stay overnight at her place and such.

He wants everything and doesn't want to lose anything. He is being pretty selfish.