They sleep in our yard. They move in herds sometimes, clip clopping down the street and slipping between cars. Sleeping here draws coyotes up from the ravines. We’re dodging them left and right out here in the suburbs. Went to pick up my kid’s prescription at the pharmacy drive thru last week and on the steep hillside up above and next to me were three practically within arm’s reach. I rolled up my window, jic they decided they liked my flowers in the bouquet sitting on the seat next to me and tried to fight me for it.

No joke, they ate my phlox and hostas to the ground right in front of me while I was sitting outside grilling on the patio, last spring. I yelled, I turned the hose on them, banged pots together. They just stared at me. Two neighbors on this street have collided with deer in the last few weeks. One in their driveway, another after they pulled up to a stop sign. They’re EVERYWHERE.