> What I'm saying is that a good number of people believe that it's one or the other when really, it's not. It's all of them combined that make these judgements of how everything works

Agree....though, there are also many other important things in play, like media/journalism/propaganda/social media ("The telephone Game")/etc.

> -Technology. -We have entered a post-truth era. -We’re polarized, sorted socially and geographically along partisan lines. -Our leaders. -Psychology.

YES!!!

I believe that we can fight back against ("the simulation" supports it physically), but we also cannot (our minds do not (yet) support it).

> Why does it have to be just one and why can't it be all?

Architectural and "software" (culture, knowledge, etc) shortcomings. Consider the conversations you read online: most people are typically utterly unable to skilfully contemplate FAR simpler problems than this! A lot of people hit their limit with one variable, let alone millions.

> Why can't we as individuals look at an opposing individual and say "everything is fucked up and we are both feeding into it"?

It is our nature.

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/The_Scorpion_and_the_Frog

>> A scorpion wants to cross a river but cannot swim, so it asks a frog to carry it across. The frog hesitates, afraid that the scorpion might sting it, but the scorpion promises not to, pointing out that it would drown if it killed the frog in the middle of the river. The frog considers this argument sensible and agrees to transport the scorpion. Midway across the river, the scorpion stings the frog anyway, dooming them both. The dying frog asks the scorpion why it stung despite knowing the consequence, to which the scorpion replies: "I am sorry, but I couldn't resist the urge. It's in my nature."

Though, if one considers the history of racism, sexism, basically any "-ism", we know that we do have some capacity for change. Were we to invest more time, attention, and resources in this domain, I would be shocked if we wouldn't make substantial progress, perhaps even rapidly. Unfortunately, we would first have to develop both the ability and desire to do that, before we would be able to actually do it, and ain't nobody got time for that. So, I suspect we will remain in this state until that changes.